• Too Crabby to Write a Proper Headline

    Hi Darling Ones, I don’t know about you, but this week has been a drag. I’m lethargic, alternately bored and unmotivated. I give this week two thumbs down and a long, sustained fart noise. Work has been a nightmare. My favorite show, Top Chef, had its finale last night and…

  • The COVID Diaries: Odd Couple

    Good afternoon Darling Ones, I googled “when is evening” and “when is afternoon” to make sure I was using the right one. I learned evening starts after six and afternoon is noon to six. For the record, it is currently 5:23 p.m. Thursday, April 1, in sunny Shakopee, MN, day…

  • The COVID Diaries: Whining & Fighting

    Ugh, Darling Ones, I’m so fucking bored today I might actually be dead because I don’t think it’s possible to be this bored for this long and continue living. I’m also cranky and a little tired, in case you were wondering. Last night I had one of those schmoopy sex…

  • The COVID Diaries: Thick Thighs Save Lives

    Dear Darling Ones, I know you are eagerly anticipating all my TikTok thoughts, epiphanies, and other keen observations, but I’m still fucking exhausted and those things are gonna require a little more thought than I have the energy to give them at the moment. So, instead, in true SpinsterFormTM, I’m…

  • InWork

    The COVID Diaries: Way Harsh, Tai

    Oh Darling Ones! This has been the roughest week. I don’t even know where to begin on what shitty thing happened on which nameless day. Cade’s been having some behavior problems, and it’s hard. So hard. I don’t know how you parents do it. Like how do you keep pushing…

  • Catching Up on Cat Content

    Thanks to the magic of TimeHop, I know that today is the 2nd anniversary of Paco’s death. This sad occasion coincides nicely with my desire to be the kind of spinster who only tells stories about her cats. All the time with the stories. Stories upon stories upon stories. The…

  • There’s Bad Blood, Jealousies, Cliques

    It’s been nearly two years since Paco died, leaving me mostly petless. Mostly, because I had every-other-weekend and all of February custody of Walter. However, that’s all changing. My sister and brother-in-law are selling their Minnesota house and he’s moving back to Portland with Walter. I have been, for the…