Hi Darling Ones, Did you know that back in aught-eight I got named-checked in Kathleen Turner’s memoir? If there’s one famous person you think would name check me, the lowly 6’5″ Spinster Goddess of Minnesota, Kathleen Turner is the obvious choice. Just kidding, Matt Dillon is the obvious choice. The dumbest thing about being mentioned in Kathleen Turner’s memoir is that I didn’t even come up with the name Kathleen Turner Overdrive of my iPod. It’s a bit from “High…
Hi Darling Ones, One of my Tea Lady friends is taking a class at The Loft, which means I got to share with them my all-time favorite piece of criticism I ever got. It’s not the note pictured above. I’ll get to that in a second. I don’t think theres photographic evidence of my favorite thing ever written on one of my short stories. Instead, I just carry the memory of those scrawled words in my heart and pull them…
Hey Darling Ones, Do you know where you were on this very day 28 years ago? What were you doing that day? I was in Hibbard Hall at The Spectator office waiting for Sister #2 and my not-yet-brother-in-law to bring me the new Pearl Jam CD. I must have had class on Tuesday morning because Sister #2 is the one who ventured to Best Buy (they opened earlier than the record store in Eau Claire) to get not one, but…
Dear Darling Ones, I’ve been thinking about Influencers today because I read a Buzzfeed listicle about shitty, entitled Influencers who wanted free things because of their influence. Barf. Influencer culture fascinates me in a rubber-necking an accident on the side of the road kind of way. I know what it is and yet I don’t get why any sane, rational person would follow an Influencer or be influenced by one. It’s all so gross, and yet one of my favorite…
Hi Darling Ones, Wendell decided at 9:36 this morning that sleeping time was over. You can see I captured the moment for posterity. At first I was affronted by his rudeness and demands for affection. But then I realized he was saving me from one of my most annoying recurring dreams, a mashup about my trust issues with my mom and my anger with Sister #3. So, I guess I owe the vengeance demon an extra belly rub. I did…
Dear Darling Ones, I turned all the rotten bananas chilling in my freezer into banana bread today. I needed the hit of smug superiority along with feelings of productivity and also taking care of myself. Flossing and banana bread are the two things guaranteed to fill me with sanctimony. So does taking the high road in most situations, however I hate when my high road taking goes unrecognized so that one’s a little complicated. I needed the hit because I’ve…
