The downstairs bathroom only has a toilet and a sink, and they are across from each other. When you sit down to do your business you get to watch yourself do it. The architect who designed this pile or bricks should be sent to the bad place.
While looking in the mirror I decided the Tootsie Pop turtle is my animal doppelgänger. If I were wearing some sort of turtle-looking shirt you’d never be able to tell us apart.
I loathe “slaps” as an adjective. “That record really slaps,” makes me want to slap. People. In their faces.
As I’ve mentioned 400 times before, I watch an hour of Supermarket Sweep three to four times a week. What I didn’t tell you is that whenever anyone wins the $5000 in the super sweep at the end of the show I laugh because I’m so happy for them. For people who won $5000 in 1992. I also laugh when someone wins Fast Money on Family Feud.
My mom says I’m sensitive.
I hate people who have spent the last 8 days convincing us they’re better than the State Fair by shitting all over every thing about it and the people who go.