You don’t know tall: The perils of being a 6’5″ single woman

So Buzzfeed’s got a piece up on tall women dating short men. I’ve wasted most of the morning reading the posts and accompanying comments. A few of may favorites? Not wanting to date shorter men is sexist, Jezebel comments where all these 5’10” women are talking about how hard it is to find taller men, and the Guardian piece where the author admits that 5’10”, while tall, isn’t freakishly tall.

As a member of the freakishly tall female clan (6’5″ in my bare feet), I find all this endlessly fascinating. While I understand what the 5’10” shorties mean when they say they just want a tall hunk of a man to curl into, I can’t help but snort in derision. It’s so snotty, I know. But come on, are the six-foot men really that hard to find? Every guy I know claims to be 6 feet tall (which makes me anywhere from 6’5″ to 7’2″ depending on the man).

I have always, always, always, always dated men shorter than me. I don’t have a choice really, there aren’t a lot of men taller than me. Plus, growing up a taller woman was never that weird. My mom is 5’10” and on his best days my dad might reach 5’7″.

So it was never weird to date shorter guys. In fact, I never even dated someone taller than me until I was in my late, late 20s. I discovered two things:
1.) Height cannot be the only thing you have in common, sadly
2.) It’s weird dating someone taller. I’m used to being the tallest person in the room no matter where I go. Always. So when I’m around someone taller than me I have this constant feeling that someone is reading my newspaper over my shoulder. It’s disconcerting.

While I would like to sit up here on my high horse, I cannot deny that I have rejected men for being too short. I am not comfortable dating a man who is close to a foot shorter than me. Is that sexist? Perhaps, but I don’t care.

That being said, dating a shorter man has more to do with the individual guy then some arbitrary number. I’ve been with 5’10” men who have made me feel like the most attractive, beautiful creature to ever walk the earth, and I’ve been with 6’7″ men who have made me feel like pond scum. I’ve realized, much too late in life, that the way he makes me feel is much more important then what people might think when they see us together.

So why don’t we see more tall women with shorter men? I think it all comes down to self confidence. Shorter men don’t approach tall women because they are sure they will be rejected, tall women don’t approach short men for the same reason.

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  1. Cassia 25.Sep.13 at 2:35 pm

    Hey this was a good post. It made me laugh I used to call my self freakishly tall also… At 6’4. When a man lands a woman of our stature Its like big game hunting. Women of all shapes and sizes are beautiful. Although I do know what you mean with the 5’10 tall thing…really? Your funny!

  2. Cassia 25.Sep.13 at 2:37 pm

    I’m sure much taller women are like 6’5 try being 7 ft lol

  3. Caduceus 20.Jan.14 at 8:25 pm

    I am six feet and I wish I could find a woman 6’5 or taller to date. I love tall women. I guess it has to do with the fact that I use to be a shorty for most of my childhood and teens. All my girlfriends were taller than me. I am far from insecure about a woman being taller than me. I would love her, cuddle with and hold her like no other!

  4. Aki 02.Feb.14 at 5:46 am

    There’s something about a tall, broad shouldered woman that makes me pause. I’m def always afraid to approach significantly taller women for fear of rejection(being 5’7 and all…), but I’ve always found taller women to be attractive.

  5. Bepina 11.Sep.14 at 2:39 pm

    Very nicely put – I’m a 6ft4 woman and I hate when people accuse tall women of being sexist because they don’t want to date a shorter guy – I’ve been rejected several times with “If you were shorter I’d date you, but you’re too tall”, and many men make remarks that I’ll never find a boyfriend because of my height, that I look a bit like a monster etc.. I gave up on shorter men because my height bothers them, not because I’m being sexist

    1. Madeline 11.Jun.15 at 5:03 pm

      Same here, lady! 6’4 here as well. Stay strong! Height rocks! (Even if men don’t)

      1. Jack 08.Oct.15 at 9:22 pm

        Not all men are a like I am 6’2″ and wouldn’t mind being with a woman taller then me I think it’s sexy and Beautiful I would Love to be with a tall sexy woman

      2. Raj 21.Apr.16 at 5:24 am

        hi … i am Raj running the modeling agency from India… looking for a female height of 6’4 and above… if you are interested please do mail your details at

      3. Eliot 03.Jul.18 at 8:11 pm

        I’d appreciate being with a very tall woman!

  6. Daniel 23.Aug.15 at 1:03 pm

    I’m 6ft 10in tall male and enjoying talking to every tall women I see which is not very many. Would love to slow dance with a women close to my height. I am always asked if I play basketball. I look down and say no do you play minature golf? I think I would get along great with taller women

  7. bill 02.Sep.16 at 3:18 pm

    hi,am bill 21 years old, 5’6 tall and i realy love tall women think they’re cool.ive had couple of experince with tall women and i think that’s cool .by the way i would like to marry a tall woman and that sounds is just that i dont have the balls,no offense.

  8. Tracy 07.Nov.16 at 7:56 am

    Is this thread still active? My girlfriend is 6’3″ and I need some advice on clothing. I would also like to organize a tall women group in the Kansas city area.

    1. chetana shetye 10.Feb.17 at 11:03 am


  9. Franklin 03.Feb.17 at 2:40 pm

    I’m a 5′ 6″ Latin male who mostly went dateless in high school. I wasn’t a loner; I just couldn’t figure out the teenage dating protocols. In college, I attracted the attention of several taller girls. Who knows why. I certainly wasn’t complaining. All of them were at least 5′ 8″ and two were six foot tall blondes. I knew then, my preference would forever remain fixed. Since my late teens, I’ve dated taller women, ranging from 5′ 8″ to the tallest, a 6′ 2″ attorney from Michigan. I can’t get enough of these leggy amazons!

  10. chetana shetye 10.Feb.17 at 10:58 am

    I am looking for 6.2 “ft ,6.4 ft” and above female for Photo shoot and movie in India.Kindly Get in touch if any one is coming to India on holiday or work purpose .I am based in Goa,India .Pay is minimum 200-500 dollars per day depending upon work n assignment.
    my contact number +91 9850468748 ,also available on whatsapp on same no.
    my email id /

  11. Jack Martin 24.Apr.17 at 2:19 pm

    I am a 6’2″ guy who has always been attracted to taller women. I have been with women from 5’10” to 6’11” and find when a woman can get her height and heels out of the equation, she becomes a very very sexy woman. My present significant other is a drop dead gorgeous woman who is 6’4″ killer legs, ankles and perfect feet size 11 and not a day goes by that I don’t realize how blessed I was meeting her,

  12. Eliot 03.Jul.18 at 8:09 pm

    I would relish the opportunity to date a tall woman. I’m 5’8 and a nice guy who likes to give and enjoy being with a 5’11 and taller.


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