The COVID Diaries: Sundays, Spinsters & Sexy Renegades

Hello Darling Ones,

You should know that I just scraped macaroni & cheese residue off the sleeve of my shirt with my thumbnail. I had macaroni and cheese for dinner last night (homemade and there was broccoli* in there too because I am a grown up). I cannot remember the last time I showered but my hair doesn’t hurt yet and I’m not stinky, so it must have been in the recent past.

I do know I’ve been wearing this shirt since Friday, which is a little astounding considering it’s kinda white. It’s the only white shirt I have because I frequently drop stuff I am eating on my chest. I like to wear this shirt with a black bra because it makes me feel like a sexy renegade and also most of the bras I’m willing to wear are black.** If you ever see me wearing the whiteish shirt with the burgundy sleeves you will know that I’m feeling like a sexy renegade that day. That information is probably not useful, but I wanted you to know it. Put it in your envelope of Jodi Chromey Fun Facts.

Another thing you should knows it that I frequently tweet #SpinsterUpdates on Twitter. These updates are usually about whatever I am doing and range from the absurd to the pathetic. I’m a lot of fun on Twitter. Last week my friend Kurtis said he envied my spinster lifestyle and that he wanted to be a spinster when he grew up. Wanna know why? Because I’m a marketing genius and my rebrand is working.

Right now I’m gonna share with you a very special Sunday morning (though it is afternoon now) #SpinsterUpdate.

This morning I got up and was ravenous. Not so ravenous that I didn’t roll around in bed for like an hour before getting dressed, but ravenous enough that my usual peanut butter bagel & apple wasn’t gonna cut it. So, I made some pretty epic breakfast burritos. Breakfast is my favorite of all the food groups and Mexican flavors are my favorite of all the flavors. I coat as much food as possible in Tajin*** and Tapatio.

It snowed something like 2 or 26 inches yesterday. Today, however, it’s bright and sunshiney. I sat on the couch with my breakfast burritos smothered in smashed avocado and the two Ts with the sun in my eyes. I turned on Lydia Loveless’ record “Somewhere Else” and I talked about books on Twitter with my pals.

As I was drinking my coffee, squinting out at the sun, and singing out loud to “To Love Somebody” I thought for numerous hot minutes in a row, if this is going to be my life forever, I can do this. If my life is going to be spent eating breakfast burritos alone while I talk about art with people I’m fond of and scratch down writing ideas in my planner and drink coffee in the sunshine while listening to good music, that will be okay. I mean, it’s not ideal, but I can do that.

While I’m on the topic, I want to point out how much I love and fear Loveless’ song. It’s a song about wanting just a little, maybe. Maybe? To me it’s about my personal struggle between that line from Perks of Being a Wallflower, “We accept the love we think we deserve” and thinking, well I don’t need very much.

Do I want so little from a romantic partner because that’s all I think I deserve? Or do I want so little because that is what I actually want?

I do know with 100% certainty I want to be on your mind. Who “you” is changes frequently, but it’s pretty safe to assume it is you. I want to be on all the minds all the time. Fucking Willie Nelson’s too.

But if nothing changes and I remain a lonely 6’5″ Spinster Goddess I’ll be okay with that. At least for today. Tomorrow might be a whole different story.

Quixotically yours,

*If you can eat, think of, or do anything regarding broccoli without singing “Chopping Broccoli” well, you are not me, because I cannot do that.
**I have many colorful bras. They are pretty and uncomfortable so I never wear them. We’ve been through this before.
***This is probably the best thing I got out of my last relationship, learning about Tajin. I gave them Jason Isbell and they gave me this delicious spice blend. I think I won on this front, at least I hope I did. It is my heart’s fondest desire that they cannot listen to “Cover Me Up” without thinking of me. I eat Tajin all the damn time without thinking of them.

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