In the interest of fair and balanced reporting, I offer up a follow up this list of career suggestions. These are the plans I have come up with for my future and shared with my coworkers that have caused them to bark with laughter:
- Art School: Apparently, according to Maria, art students don’t have mortgages.
- Fiction Writer: This prompted a “can people really support themselves doing that?” I told them that John Updike did about 100 years ago. They didn’t know who John Updike was.
- Philosopher: This one didn’t get a laugh so much as an eye roll.
- Coat-tail rider: This is going back to my “you suckers find jobs and hire me” plan. Probably my best bet.
All of this is really for naught since I announced a little bit ago that I think I have a brain tumor and will probably die before I have to actually get a job.
In other news, this is my last day of work before Christmas vacation. I have fourteen days off in a row and that’s making me absolutely punch drunk with giddiness.