Dear Darling Ones, Yesterday BFK walked into Supergenius HQ toting a giant, glittery-snowflake dappled bag with tissue paper peeping out of the top. I took one look at it and said, “If that’s for me I’m gonna be pissed.” She grimaced at me as she dropped the bag at my feet. “You said you only want presents that make me think, Jodi needs to have that.” I scowled and made huffy breath noises, because I did say that. I say…
Hello Darling Ones, I’m taking time out of my very busy “Succession” obsession to set my intentions for 2022. Why now when I have an entire season and a half of “Succession” to watch? There are three reasons. I’ve watched something like fifteen hours of TV over the past three days and my brain needs a break. I only listened to the Joy Oladokun record once today and I was beginning to feel a little empty. According to the four…
Dear Darling Ones, As I type it is 57º in Shakopee, Minnesota on this the 15th day of December in the year 2021. Future Darling Ones may read that sentence and be all, no bigs, so it’s a little chilly in Minnesota in December, that happens sometimes. Oh, Future Darling Ones, I’m so sorry about the hellscape you inherited. It sucks. Back in the olden days Minnesota was consistently cold and snowy in the winter. Now, in the year 2021…
Hi Darling Ones, Moments before I started typing this I found myself vociferously singing along to a cover of U2’s “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For.” This surprised me because I fucking hate U2. Like a lot. A lot. A lot. A lot. U2, Arcade Fire, Dawes, and Radiohead can all take a flying leap as far as I’m concerned. If none of their songs (except for “Creep” never desecrated my ears again I would be the better…
Dearest Darling Ones, I apologize in advance for this one. I’m about to do a bunch of things a writer should never do. I know this and am going to do it anyway. Mostly because I feel super shitty and I have found that typing it out sometimes makes me feel better. I’m writing while hungry and low key dehydrated. I’m pretty despondent and been crying for roughly four hours, hence the dehydration. I’m being very melodramatic in my head…
Hi Darling Ones, I almost started this letter with a giant lie. It was how I hate mottos, self-help aphorisms, maxims, and the like. But then I remembered I had three and soon-to-be four mottos that I generally live by. 1. You can go ahead and shut the fuck up. This is something I say to myself about 8365 times a day. I frequently want to be the kind of asshole who is shitty about things a lot of people…