The COVID Diaries: Infected?

Welp, Darling Ones,

Did I 100% jinx myself by complaining about COVID the other day? Absolutely I did. No amount of logic or rational thinking is gonna convince me otherwise.

While I won’t know with absolute certainty if I’ve been stricken with the COVID until the at-home PCR test I ordered arrives, I take it, send it back, and get the results, but I’m pretty sure I’m infected. It’s either that or a rotten cold. But it’s probably COVID.

Please spare me advice on quicker tests. I’m not going to stand in line for hours with anyone for anything,* much less people who may be sick. I know there are drive-through places. I’m sick. The last thing I want to do is sit in my truck waiting to be tested. Whether I find out it’s COVID today, tomorrow, Wednesday doesn’t really matter as far as I can tell. Seems as though regardless if it’s a cold or COVID the advice is the same — isolate/quarantine, stay hydrated, if things get super shitty go to urgent care.

Frankly, I don’t have the energy or the patience to chase all this nonsense down. I feel as though I should be handling this better in some way. How, I am not sure. Being more proactive about having tests on hand? Isolating to the point where I lose my fucking mind and pray for death? I don’t know. I have to keep reminding myself “I AM SICK!” Someone should write a COVID guide for single people who live alone and also work from home. What are the proper procedures? And why are they the proper ones? I need some answers damnit.

The worst part is, that despite knowing better, I feel as though this is a moral failing on my part. If I were a better, more virtuous person I would not be sick right now. I’m even a little nervous posting this because I fear the judgement of strangers on the Internet.

At least I’m pretty sure I’m not gonna die. Mostly I feel like I have a shitty cold that is stuck in my sinuses and a little bit in my chest. My voice sounds sexy as hell. Things started to go wonky in my body Thursday afternoon. My throat hurt and I had dry mouth like you wouldn’t believe. I tried to magical think my way into health by blaming the dry, arctic Minnesota air, but things got progressively worse. I feel like my electric toothbrush when it needs to be recharged. I’m still operating on some level but I’m not doing a very good job of it.

One of the Tea Ladies who was already struck by the COVID said she started feeling progressively better after day three. I’m holding on to that because I’m already bored with being sick.

Infectiously yours,

*Not even Matt Dillon.

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