yesterday i had to babysit jaycie and max. they decided, despite my protestations, that we were gonna have A&W for lunch. since i lost the official coin toss, we went. i’m all about fair aunting (it’s like parenting but without any real responsibility).

as we were sitting there munching our hot dogs and slurping our root beers (or in my case, a salad and orange pop), jaycie made an astute observation.

“it says All American Food here, and there, and over there,” she said, pointing to the happy meal bag, the root beer cup, and a sign above our heads. “why do they have to say it all the time. i know it’s All American Food.”
“because it’s part of their brand,” i said, because it was the truth and i didn’t know what else to say.
“what’s a brand?” she asked.
“a brand is something a company wants to be known for, something they want you to think of when you think of them, sort of what they want to be,” i said.
“oh,” she said. “so A&W wants to be All American Food?”
“yeah, i guess.”
“how do you know about brands?” she asked.
“it’s what i do for work,” i said.
“oh, so do other people have brands?”
“sure, all sorts of companies have brands.”
“what’s target’s?”
“eat well, pay less.”
“that’s super target,” she said.
“what other brands are there?” max asked.
“tons of them, all sorts of them, just think of all the different cereals, they all have brands,” i said.
“like general mills or kelloggs?” jaycie asked.
“sort of,” i said and thought what the hell kind of kid knows about general mills nad kelloggs? “well, when you think of frosted flakes, what do you think of?” i asked.
“tony the tiger!” jaycie said.
“right!” i said.
“and what does he say?”
“they’re grrrreeeaaattt!” she said jumping up and pointing her finger.
“yes,” i said. “because they want you to think frosted flakes are great whenever you think about them.”
“but they aren’t great,” max said.
“i know,” i said. “you don’t have to agree with their brand. in fact, you should just think for yourself.”
“but trix are for kids,” jaycie said.
“yes,” i said. “of course they are.”
“what other brands are there?” she asked.
“what do you think of when you think McDonalds?” i asked.
“buh buh buh bup baah, i’m lovin’ it,” she said.
“right,” i said.
“what’s Wal-Mart’s brand?” she asked.
“everyday low prices,” i said.
“oh,” she said. “i thought it was about not treating people nice.”
“well, that’s what they do, not what they want you to think.”