there should be a point after so much not sleeping that your brain just shuts off, your body chooses Start > Turn off, and you just fall into the deep, deep restless sleep of the zombified, or something. i think i got about two hours of sleep last night, if i was lucky. i did have a 20 minute power nap this morning that helped me make it through the day.
apparently the power nap did noticeable wonders, because when i bolted into my VERY IMPORTANT 9 a.m. meeting, with sunglasses on my face, diet coke with lime in hand, and swanky bag slung across my body, at 9:04– the only comment i got was how energized i look, happy, ready to attack the long weekend.
that made me laugh right outloud. because then i confessed to allison in hushed tones, while the technical difficulties that made the meeting even later than i was were worked out, about how i decided it was a good idea to get shift-faced drunk, watch the timberwolves lose and only sleep for two hours.
of course, once again she trumped me.
“i got my pictures.”
“as soon as we get outta here, ok?”
and she nodded.
i was a little worried about the picture viewing. i mean, afterall, my reaction to her video thing was immediate, unsuspected, disturbing, and upsetting. plus couple this picture viewing with the inadequate sleep, bewilderment at my own recent events– and well, it seemed i was just asking for trouble.
but i had to see them. i had to. so i pulled up a chair in her cube and dug right in. i had to blink quite rapidly, quite often. but this time my eyes watered not for my loneliness, not for my heartache, not for my desire to be THE girl instead of a girl, this time i misted up because of the stunning beauty of the pictures. the photographers ability to capture love on film is amazing. i’ve never seen al’s smile look so genuine, so honest, so like it was never ever going to leave her face.
envy? sure. but today i am proud to say it was beaten down in the face of my friend’s love. she got it right and that’s enough for rejoicing.