sometimes when the loneliness comes crashing in i don’t think i will be strong enough to stop it from crushing me, leaving me flat and unable to breathe. i try not to panic, but the tears get stuck inside making my throat hurt and then i can never remember what to do.
and it’s hard to call anyone because i am always ashamed to admit i am lonely. plus i know if i were to open my mouth and form words that the tears would come and they would not stop for a long, long time. mostly i think this might all go away if i could just find some people in my life who would like to and willingly spend some time with me because they found me interesting and not so much just an afterthought.