Well, well, well, Darling Ones,

Today is the 40th anniversary of “Let it Be” (The Replacements’ version), which contains the song “I Will Dare,” which happens to be the greatest side one, track one of all time.

ALL TIME!

If I were better at seeing into the future I’d have saved a few thoughts brought on by the 28th Anniversary of The ‘Mats’ ‘Let it Be’ for a more monumental anniversary. Even twelve years into my blogging career I couldn’t predict I’d make it twenty-four years. Though to be fair, forty years in, what more can be said about “Let it Be?” I’m sure there are forty GenX guys who got paid to pontificate on the significance of this record, but lord knows none of us need more GenX guys yammering on about The Replacements.

You’ve heard the song before, right? Give it a listen. It’s sonic joy. A few years I had a very cranky reader complained that she finally listened to it and hated the song. That’s neither here nor there, but just something I was thinking about.

I’ve been failing to adequately explain to the Internet why this song for twenty-four years.

It’s not the first Replacements’ song I heard. That was “Merry Go Round” as documented in Jim Walsh’s All Over But the Shouting.

And on a pretty regular basis it’s not even my favorite ‘Mats’ song. Some days it’s “Can’t Hardly Wait” and others it’s “If Only You Were Lonely.” However, if you ask me what my all-time favorite song is I often say “I Will Dare.”

It is for-sure, with zero doubt the one song guaranteed to make me smile. Usually my body recognizes the song before my brain does and my heart starts to beat a little faster, my blood feels zingier in my veins, and then I start to smile. I say to myself, without fail, “I love this song” every time I hear it. Why not this song?

I can tell you there are way worse songs/mottos to build your life around. I will dare is sometime I whisper to myself every day, especially now post-stroke. It’s a nice way to motivate myself to do something I don’t want to do or am afraid to do.

This whole letter is a little all over the place, forgive me. About halfway through writing I got hit in the face with allergies and now my head is all floaty and wooshy. But I couldn’t let this anniversary go without saying something. Who knows were I’ll be in 2029 or 2034? Still writing, I hope.

Counting the rings around my watery eyes,
Jodi

The post Why That Song? appeared first on I Will Dare.

Hello Darling Ones,

Today marks eight months since my college friend Baltus died. Also, eight months since I had a stroke.

These two events are inextricably linked in my damaged brain. My poor, defective brain that I continue to love even though it’s kind of a jerk.

I still have an immense amount of guilt for worrying everyone by having a stupid stroke. Boy. would the people I love be bummed if I died.

Same.

I’m pretty glad I continue to exist even though the repercussions from the stroke remain a giant pain in my ass. Being broke and unable to walk well or see clearly sucks. A lot. Being dead would suck more.

And, not to mention, I would have missed out on all this stuff:

• That ‘Mats episode of The Bear
• The beauty that is Carmy
• Being able to shout “I have brain damage” whenever I do or say something boneheaded
• The Bully record
• The Ratboys record
• The Lydia Loveless record
• The Boygenius record
• Pride in accomplishing physical tasks I didn’t think I could do
• That Lucinda Williams’ memoir where she writes about her affair with Paul Westerberg (ick) and Ryan Adams*dirtbag (17,982 icks)
• Sister #4 moving back to MN
• The way my community showed up hard in a way I did not expect
• Ridding Supergenius HQ of 14+ boxes of crap I did not need, including (I think) 23 unused notebooks
• Sending Heather that blanket
• The end of Succession
• Cello version of “Can’t Hardly Wait”
• A fuzzy, yellow cardigan with pockets that is my new best friend
• Fergus
• Mortimer
• Wendell
• The way the three cats stampeded down the stairs (or up the stairs) when I shout “KITTENS!”
• Brownies
• Being able to write and send many, many thank you cards
• Thinking up the most brilliant blanket to make and enter in the State Fair creative arts competition
• Feeling awe at the resiliency of my brain despite its jerkiness
• Finally working enough in one month to make enough money to pay my mortgage
• The pure joy of getting my occupational therapist to refer to my bum arm as my “Floopy Scoop” on a regular basis
• Being able to say “Well, I had a stroke” whenever anyone asks how I’m doing
• Discovering thin crust pizza doesn’t make my blood sugar sky rocket
• The animated Snoopy watch face the amuses me endlessly
• You

Took a licking & kept on ticking,
Jodi

P.S. That sounds so dirty, which makes me laugh, but Oldsters know it’s a Timex reference.

The post Things I Would Have Missed if I Died 8 Month Ago appeared first on I Will Dare.

Oh Darling Ones,

Being a Replacements fan is sometimes the worst. Being a female ‘Mats fan is always the absolute worst.

As you may or may not know, the “Tim (Let it Bleed Edition)” was released today. It’s a remastered version of “Tim” with a whole bunch of other amazing stuff. Specifically, “Can’t Hardly Wait (Cello Version)”.

As is to be expected, boners are up all over town about this record. I was so excited I stayed up until 2 a.m. listening to it.

However, unlike a lot of ‘Mats fans, I am not myopic sycophant. I believe you can love a band and still be critical.

So last night I was on Bluesky, the Twitter clone, complaining about the box set because it’s four CDs, one LP, and some other stuff. It cost $90! Sure it’s expensive, but more importantly what in the hell am I gonna do with four CDs? Listen to them in my 1999 Chevy S10, which I still cannot drive because of the stroke.

And I get it, the ‘Mats are not required to cater to my specific listening habits.

What bothers me is the guy I’m having an argument with on Bluesky is all “well, there’s one vinyl.”

REALLY? I HAD NO IDEA!

I’m a dumb girl who was invested enough in the new release to listen to that Cello Version 100 times and find out there are four CDs, but I stopped reading after that.

Come on, Dude.

You’re ‘Matsplaining to someone who has the words “I Will Dare” in her username. Did you really think I didn’t know there was a record included?

Just seeing that username should have given him enough information to figure out I would have known about the record.

What sucks is this is not unusual. I get ‘Matsplained to all the time. And it’s frequently by men who email me from the Paul Westerberg site I created and maintain.

What sucks is that men will tweet about the ‘Mats and address their tweets to Dads. Hello?

I’ve been a fan for thirty fucking years, and that gets me nothing because I am a woman. I guess love of rock & roll and knowledge of it is stored in the testicles.

It’s so frustrating, and especially maddening this week after the Jann Wenner bullshit.

Wenner just said the quiet stuff out loud. Rock Dudes everywhere are rushing to condemn him for the racism and misogyny, as they should, but those very same Rock Dudes never hold space for anyone else to contribute their thoughts about rock & roll.

I complain a lot about how men do not value art made by women, but they also don’t hold space for women to talk about music made by anybody.

I saw a tweet after the Wenner stuff came out and the guy said, oh this is probably a think piece I’ll write.

Oh joy! What we really need is another white dude rock pundit, and his thoughts on sexism and racism in rock & roll.

The problem isn’t just that Jann Wenner is a misogynistic racist, he’s always been that way. It’s that he has been allowed to influence a large swath of pop culture history.

He’s not alone. A lot of men erase the work of women and people of color all the time. This is why it’s so problematic when we let white men be the ones who write the history of rock & roll or pop culture.

Last year Chuck Klosterman wrote an entire book about the 90s that was lauded by a lot of people, and he completely erased third-wave feminism and Riot Grrrl. That happened in the 90s, but you wouldn’t know it from his book.

It’s not that women and people aren’t there, aren’t important, or aren’t influential. It’s that their work is deemed less than by the men who get to write about rock & roll, and pop culture. They don’t see the value in it so it doesn’t get written about, and that is fucking garbage.

Love & kisses,
Jodi

P.S. I have to say that the male Westernerds of my acquaintance have always held space for the female Westernerds. In fact, one tweeted today about how “‘Mats fans” would enjoy something, and not how “Dads” might like it.

The post Men Explain The Replacements to Me appeared first on I Will Dare.

Oh Darling Ones,

Today I got my mind on my money and my money on my mind.

I started the day tweeting about the Slim Dunlap family moving sale and ended it losing another client.

Fuck. On both counts.

If you’re not a ‘Mats person, Slim Dunlap took over for Bob Stinson. Slum suffered a stroke in 2012. Maybe you remember the whole “Songs for Slim” thing circa 2013.

Slim has been on my mind a lot since surviving my own stroke in March. I count every one of my lucky stars that my stroke was not as severe as his. Hopefully, my ongoing medical care won’t be too expensive.

However, the current financial anxiety is real and it’s scary as hell.

I became a freelancer in 2009 after a second layoff in two years. In the fourteen years since I bet on myself I rarely regretted my decision to work for me.

Being a freelancer taught me how to live with financial ambiguity and a childhood growing up in poverty taught me frugality and hard word.

I worked so hard to build my business so I could cover my living expenses, pay off my debt (mostly student loans), and start to save. It has not been easy. I made a lot of difficult choices to live a life I loved. I didn’t go on vacations. I drive (or did until my stroke took away my ability to drive) a 1999 Chevrolet S-10 that’s been paid off since 2007.

Since March everything I made so many sacrifices for, worked tirelessly for is slowly vanishing.

Now, I have $21,000+ in medical debt and it feels like a dwindling ability to not just pay that off, but to cover my living expenses.

Losing four clients is rough. I’ve built my life and career on servicing a small cadre of clients. I’m proud that I’ve worked with some my entire freelance career.

I try to comfort myself by telling me they weren’t high-dollar clients, though I was in the running for $10K project that slipped through my stroke-addled fingers in March.

Can you see why I’m a little freaked out?

While I know when it comes down to it my family won’t let me fall too far, I’m still scared. I’ve taken care of myself by myself for so long having to lean on them for housing or money will do a real number on my mental wellbeing.

Right now I’m living in a world of regrets and what ifs.

What if I worked a “real job” and had a lot more social capital? What if higher salaries meant I had a bigger financial safety net? What if every decision I ever made was wrong?

Fuck.

Jodi

The post On Slim Dunlap & the Financial Realities of a Stroke appeared first on I Will Dare.

Hey Darling Ones,

Still working really hard on distracting myself from grief while simultaneously procrastinating from actual paying work. I’m so good at this I could call myself a life coach and start charging for these kinds of life hacks.

Today in pointless garbage I spent a lot of time thinking about we have The Replacements. Perhaps you’ve heard of them. I’ll get back to this in a minute.

Also today we had a new episode of the one (1) podcast I listen to. It’s called 60 Songs that Explain the 90s. I’m a little behind because some of the songs I do not care about, and sometimes, despite his best efforts, my Imaginary Boyfriend Rob Harvilla gets a little too dude-y in his dudeness. Like there was an episode recently where he talked endlessly about video games and the guest was also a dude and I almost died.

But today, Imaginary Boyfriend Rob Harvilla, made it up to me with the episode featuring the 75th song that explains the 90s, “Zombie” by The Cranberries. This one is not my favorite The Cranberries song, I’m team “Linger.” But this is Sister #2’s favorite so I got some residual affection for it. In this episode Rob Harvilla talked about both Ferris Bueller, the game Masterpiece , and being tall. I was gonna say we were now imaginary married, but even in my imagination I do not want that.

In the episode he talked about how “Zombie” had nearly 1 billion listens on Spotify, which was shocking to me. It had way more than both “Linger” and “Dreams.”

That got me thinking about what the most listened to ‘Mats’ songs were. So I looked and I’m a little surprised but not much. Before I get to the Top 10, I will let you know that “Gimme Noise” is the least listened to song with only 102,965 listens.

For transparency sake, I only checked standard studio albums, Sorry Ma through All Shook Down. There were a bunch of the live songs on all those reissues that had 0 listens.

So. hold your life, here’s the kinda surprising but not totally list of Top 10 Most Listened to The Replacements’ Songs on Spotify.

1. Swingin’ Party — 26,208,160 This song at #1 is obviously due to the Lorde cover from awhile back.
2. Androgynous — 17,718,282 I bet this one rates high because of the Joan Jett cover.
3. Can’t Hardly Wait — 14,711,853 Frankly, should be #1
4. Alex Chilton — 13,922,953
5. Bastards of Young — 13,853,071 Should be #2
6. Here Comes a Regular — 8,512,862
7. I Will Dare — 8,332,721 Rude, Spotify users.
8. Unsatisfied — 6,214,722
9. I’ll Be You — 3,584,389 This was the only ‘Mats song to make the Billboard Hot 100 at 51. So not surprised it’s on the list, but shocked it’s above Left of the Dial.
10. Left of the Dial — 3,442,950 Should be at least top 5

For the record my personal Top 5 ‘Mats’ songs list goes something like this:

1. I Will Dare
2. Can’t Hardly Wait
3. If Only You Were Lonely
4. Skyway
5. Here Come’s a Regular

At least that was a list I sent to a friend last week after putting 15 seconds of thought into it.

So, the moral of this long rambling story is Spotify listeners have awful taste and also, I am right.

Love,
Jodi

The post The Replacements’ Top 10 Songs According to Spotify Listeners appeared first on I Will Dare.