Just Thinking About the Weather

So Darling Ones,

Allegedly, a metric fuckton of snow is going to fall from the sky and land on the Twin Cities and surrounding areas over the next three days.

The meteorologists say it’s likely 16-20 inches of snow will fall from Tuesday afternoon through Thursday night. Though, I’ve seen some maps that say 25-28 inches is likely in the Twin Cities metro area.

I am calling this storm the #BigBlizzardInMyBackYard.

If you learn one thing about Minnesotans from this blog, please let it be how very much we enjoy talking about weather. I love that for and about us. This means we always, always, always have small talk at the ready for every situation.

  • Hot enough for you?
  • It’s not the heat. It’s the humidity.
  • We really need the rain.
  • Cold enough for you?
  • It’s so cold the tears froze in my eyes.
  • Sometimes it snows in April, Prince even said so.
  • If it snows in May I will do some murder.
  • October is beautiful and perfect and the only reason to live in this hellscape. That, and the right to have an abortion being law.

See? The topics are endless, as is the fear of impending climate disaster.

Despite being an angry hermit who rarely leaves the house, this kind of weather triggers my severe weather anxiety. I’m all kinds of amped up even though I have nowhere I need to go and nothing I need.

I did some panic grocery shopping and have my kitchen stocked to comfortable levels. For me comfortable levels means I can make bacon and eggs for ten people if I needed to. I don’t even like to cook bacon, and yet I feel best when there are three packs of it in the freezer at all times.

Also, just to be super safe, I have three pints of ice cream, three kinds of bread, and eight donuts (all the same kind, I’m not totally off my rocker).

You can take the food-insecure child out of poverty, but you can’t take that insecurity out the middle-class woman she grows up to be.

Bring on the blizz,

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