we regret to inform you, an official letter from the IBL committee

dear AC Newman,

we here at supergenius headquarters regret to inform you of your recent slide from the top of the Imaginary Boyfriend List (IBL). for quite a long time you were our most favorite rock and roller, made even more special because of your absolutely wonderful orangey red hair (and you know how we love red hair).

but dear, dear AC there is someone else currently taking roost in the number one slot. that would be Ted Leo and his accompanying pharmacists. i’m sorry AC, but while you have red hair, Ted Leo has (I have just a learned) an EP called “Guitar for Jodi.” JODI. that’s my name AC and it’s even spelled correctly.

So AC, you have been officially knocked into the #2 position on the IBL. please feel free to petition the committee about your loss of status. they will be more than willing to listen to you plead your case. also, you should probably know the committee is totally swayed by gifts of books, orangey flowers, and chocolate.

good luck with your petition AC it has been a pleasure having you top the charts.


the IBL committee of supergenius, inc.

P.S. so do you know ted leo? can you get us the hook up?

P.P.S. what kind of cruel fate is it that The Current is currently playing your “battle for straight time” at this very moment as we write this regrettable letter and a mere three songs after ted’s very own “the angels’ share.” oh we are fortune’s fool indeed.

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  1. alan 09.Feb.05 at 2:36 pm

    i knew i missed reading your page for a reason 😀

    Ted Leo is now my hero, not necessarily for the same reasons he is #1 IBL, but because he is ted leo + PHARMACISTS.

  2. Carl Newman 09.Feb.05 at 2:39 pm

    But I’m way better in the sack than that blasted Ted Leo. I promise.

  3. jodi 09.Feb.05 at 3:20 pm

    Carl, we would need documented proof of this alleged sack action before we could make any ruling.

    –the mgmt.

  4. Carl Newman 09.Feb.05 at 3:55 pm

    Ok. Well here’s a pic of me in the ‘afterglow.’ Don’t mind the dude standing next to me. He’s my security guard. http://www.youngandsexy.org/young/images/tour2/carl_ted.jpg

    Also, lest not forget the name of my band. The New Pornographers ain’t just a name given to Michael Jackson’s defense team. On a side note, one of his lawyers represented Jenna Jamison in that molded vagina product conspiracy years ago. Luckily for her, she maintained her vag integrity and identity. Phew…

  5. Charles 10.Feb.05 at 2:19 am


    I just wanted to share that the company’s internet radio filter does not seem to see The Current. I am listening right now and am happy. Happy at work in the middle of the fuckin night? Yeah.