my stomach hurt a little as i entered the big best buy. the greeter girl greeted me kindly, but i had only the wannest of smiles for her. i walked directly the aisle that ended with Neil Young and held my breath, wide spread panic, no; white lion, no; come on come on, it was like my brain had forgotten the alphabet. then, to my delight i spied “Come Feel Me Tremble” i was so close.

i flipped the “Come Feel Me Tremble” and behind it was “Dead Man’s Shake” then i flipped again, another CFMT, and another. my heart was starting to break a little. i jumped to the rack below, nope the Police. what were the police doing so close to st. paul? hmm. i looked up in abject terror. it wasn’t here. no “Folker” for me. of course, my look of terror did not go unnoticed. a best buy boy in yellow was soon at my side.
“can i help you find something today?”
“no,” i said, trying to hide my disappointment. “i’m just looking.”

as best buy boy left, i reached out to the police, blaming them for my troubles. and as i flipped the two CDs over, THERE IT WAS!

FOLKER smiled up to me in all it’s ruby red glory. it was mine, a day before the official release. mine all mine. i couldn’t supress my beatific smile. and in my haze of good feelings i decided to throw a prop Tommy Stinson’s way a picked up “Village Gorilla Head.” with my smile and my replacements’ solo projects in hand, i headed to the cash register. i had to wait forever as Neb, the freckled best buy boy working the cash register, checked out the guy in front of me and his Epson Stylus Photo Printer.

i stood staring up at the Geek Squad sign and shifted my weight from foot to foot.

“did you find everything you needed?” Neb asked.
“Yes!” i said with entirely more enthusiasm than necessary and thought about asking him what in the hell Neb could be short for.
“do you want a bag?” he asked.
“No,” i said as i tore the CDs out of his hand and bolted for the door.

“have a good day,” greetergirl said.
“you too!” i said, fumbling with my keys so i could use them as an implement of CD opening.

i stumbled across the parking lot, ripping into the plastic as a lexus waited for me to cross. i jammed the CD into ruby’s changer and was immediately greeted with new paul westerbergian goodness, “buy it now, buy it now, buy it now, this is my single, this is my jingle.”

i actually laughed out loud as i drove out the parking lot. i smiled so big all the way home my cheeks hurt a little. i even had to give a happy little nod to Buck Hill!.

and now, i’m sure you can guess what i’ll be doing for the rest of the day.