so i’m just sitting here, reading through old archives, because i find myself amusing and am under some bizarre misconception that i might be able to bore myself back to sleep and i keep getting attacked by this random ladybug.

perhaps you don’t know but we here in the upper midwest are suffering through a plague of ladybugs. which i think i might have heard on NPR (or made up) aren’t really ladybugs but really aggressive japanese beetlethings disguised as ladybugs.

it’s really pretty gross. on sunday i had 23 ladybug-imitators hanging out on the patio door. there are seven to 14 of them who have taken up permanent residence in the corner over by the tall bookcase and the air conditioner. i have stopped turning on that light for fear of riling their anger, having them swarm me and killing myself while trying to swat them away.

but this beetle cum ladybug is just too much for me. i’m still just trying to laugh at archives and it’s flapping it’s red-dotted wings all loud and batlike somewhere in my hearing range. i can’t seem to find her because i haven’t turned on all the lights (because i’m still convinced i’m going back to sleep), so i just hear the flutter of the wings and see an occasional blur from the corner of my eye.

finally she decided to land next to my mouse. i was gonna smoosh her but i couldn’t because she had 13 dots on her wings, which in my mind still means she’s 13 years old, and i still can’t forget (despite the fact that he won’t return my e-mails) that bugs are not for smooshing. but still, and all, it’s like 4 in the morning and so i didn’t smoosh her, i just flicked her away.

i call it a draw.