1. i thought the world got together and unanimously agreed that Fridays were officially ‘slack’ days where not much got done, where i work is staging a protest
2. for some reason the iTunes original version of Liz Phair’s ‘Why Can’t I?’ is just breaking my heart
3. i am really quite lonely lately. lonelier than i have been in years, and it’s so rotten that just typing it makes my eyes sting with tears. i am afriad that i have given up on love and i don’t like to be the kind of person who gives up on anything. i don’t even think of it as a possiblity for me anymore and i can’t seem to figure out what changed that i have just ruled it out. it scares me that i haven’t even considered going on a date, finding someone to date or even whined about not having a date in months. has my heart died?
4. that is all
ally sheedy warned me that when you get old your heart dies, i thought she was wrong
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sometimes you have to give up. it’s a complete and utter cliche, but it really is true. which is why it’s a cliche, i guess.
OR, you’ve finally become comfortable and happy with yourself and have ceased the 20-something “quest” for happiness with a partner.
Maybe lonely feelings like what you have now are akin to the married person’s “Holy shit why did I marry this asshole I ruined my own life” feelings.
I’m always thrilled when I find that I’m not thinking about dating…it means my heart is starting to catch up with my brain that I don’t need to be married to be whole.
Maybe your heart is doing the same thing–not dying, but growing.
Yeah. What Kelly said. Hope you feel better soon. Have you tried the jelly bean solution?
This week I decided to give up giving up on stuff. i.e. I long ago accepted that a Replacements reunion was NEVER gonna happen…