Lamenting the lack of storytelling on the web

Once upon a time, in a land not so far away there lived a fairly-fair supergenius named Jodi.

Jodi was your typical supergenius spending too much time reading books, watching horrible TV, and surfing the web. On occasion she could be roused from her castle to participate in the more social aspects of life. The rousing was made all the easier if it involved charred animal flesh made in the outdoors. Or gin.

This kind of existence left our fairly-fair super-g mostly fulfilled. Since the supergenius sort of made her living as a blogger, she spent a lot of time reading blogs. A lot of time reading a lot of blogs (469 according to her trusted Google Reader).

But lately she found herself lamenting the sameness of all the ones she read. Many of the blogs talked about the death of the newspaper industry and how they needed to adapt to continue. She found this ironic in the real sense of the word considering many of the blogs (news and otherwise) were mostly just newspapers electrified. The writing was the same — staid, fact-filled, inverted pyramid even. It was the pot calling the kettle black.

Even the allegedly personal blogs were a bit more on the fact-telling side of whothefuckcares, than she wanted. Reporting the events of the blogger’s life in the most newsy way possible does not make for fun reading. While the supergenius did, in fact, find it interesting what these myriad strangers were doing, she longed to know what they were thinking and feeling while they were doing those interesting things.

The supergenius desired storytelling and lamented the fact that there wasn’t more of it so easily available on the web. “Blogs are prime for storytelling, are they not?” she asked her cat Madison, who agreed heartily.

Jodi wracked her brain to name a few blogs that told good stories on the web. Alas, she only came up with a handful of them, a majority falling firmly into the realm of “mommy blog.” And Christa.

She wondered why at a time when so many people are compelled to tell their stories, they seem to skip the actual story part. Why? Is it too much effort to add a little art to the report? Or is it because so many writers on the web are like bad fictional characters, presenting themselves without any hardship or conflict. Or maybe they’re too busy reporting all the fabulous things they do with all the fabulous people to find the whimsy or magic in their everyday lives. Or maybe they were just boring.

“Stop being so boring!” Jodi, our fairly-fair supergenius, shouted out to the universe. “Tell me an interesting story.”
“You know, you’ve been kind of boring lately,” Paco said.
“Yeah, well, fuck you,” Jodi said.
“You could try harder,” he said.
“I will,” she said.

And they all lived happily ever after.

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  1. shelaka 15.Jun.09 at 4:34 pm

    Hey, I’m just sorry for my incredibly boring post on the Westernerd site- d’yoh! “Hey, I heard a song, and it was about the Replacements, and that’s a cool thing!” Scintillating, sir! Comments: Zero.

    Anyhoo – I always find your posts a hoot. You’ve got a good sense of humor. Or maybe it’s ’cause you throw in the odd, well-placed f’nheimer.

    Keep on a’postin’ & a’writin’!

  2. Victoria Porter 16.Jun.09 at 4:30 pm

    I mentally shouted “HELL YEAH” to this post, Jodi. Can I tell you why I have a boring blog? I’m afraid. I’m afraid of work finding my blog. I’m afraid of hurting others with what I write. I’m afraid of all the better bloggers out there. Because I’m so flipping afraid, I never end up blogging and what I write is boring.

    I promise to be less afraid and tell a damn story once in a while, okay?

  3. Victoria Porter 16.Jun.09 at 4:32 pm

    …and then I linked to the wrong blogging site. Sheesh. I’m going to get off my soapbox now.


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