If you could see (and hear) me now

You would find a rather large woman sitting in a rather large green chair wearing blue pajama pants smeared with cinnamon roll frosting (marks left by the Tibbles on Wednesday) and a black cardigan sweater coated in cat hair. Her own hair is a greasy mess that she has ruffled into greasy spikes, because it makes her laugh everytime she catchers her reflection in the laptop’s reflective screen.

On the arm of the chair is a pair of orange socks and three books (If on a winter’s night a traveler, Winesburg, Ohio, and The Scribner Anthology of Contemporary Short Ficiton). There are too many things on the table next to her to list, not to mention the window sill that is in reach of her go-go-gadget arms.

She sings along loudly to “Confetti” by The Lemonheads, only you can’t hear The Lemonheads because she’s wearing her favorite cans.

This, darling ones, is why it is best that I live alone.

(Visited 30 times, 1 visits today)

9 Comments

  1. UH 07.Nov.08 at 5:59 pm

    Hopefully, you still remember what it’s like to work with others (or the dream job is one where you work from home). Cat hair, frosting, and greasy spiky coiffure may put your new cow orkers off their feed, y’know?

    Reply
  2. Will Tupper 07.Nov.08 at 7:10 pm

    What type of notebooks do you like? You write a lot, so I was wondering.

    And what type of pens (while I’m at it)? I know you’ve mentioned them before (years ago!), but I don’t remember.

    Reply
  3. Will Tupper 07.Nov.08 at 7:11 pm

    Oh, um… I saw your little “tweet” post over there on the right. Hence my curiousity.

    Not like I was just asking out of the blue or something.

    I’m going to go now :).

    Reply
  4. Jodi 07.Nov.08 at 10:07 pm

    Will, someone gave me a Moleskine for my birthday and I LOVE it. The paper is really nice, and the Lamy Safaris that I use don’t leak through. So nice.

    However, they’re expensive. So, when I saw the Large Reporter’s notebooks on sale at Amazon for $3 a piece I loaded up.

    Reply
  5. Will Tupper 07.Nov.08 at 11:00 pm

    Sweet – another Moleskine convert! They are really cool, aren’t they?

    And Lamy SAFARIS. That’s what I couldn’t remember!

    You rule! Thanks so much.

    Huzzah,

    WT

    Reply
  6. Jodi 07.Nov.08 at 11:02 pm

    I am a Safari junkie and am trying to talk myself out of getting a beautiful lime-green number.

    Reply
  7. david 08.Nov.08 at 9:53 am

    I keep a Moleskine with me at all times, in my back pocket or laptop bag, it’s essential.

    Great blog, by the way. I searched Google for “frosting-smeared black cardigan-wearing tall redhead writers who read Sherwood Anderson and are not Paul Westerberg” and this was the first result. I will be coming back often.

    Reply
  8. Jodi 08.Nov.08 at 9:55 am

    I am honored that of all the results for frosting-smeared black cardigan-wearing tall redhead writers who read Sherwood Anderson and are not Paul Westerberg you chose to read this one. It’s a very crowded, competitive field.

    Reply
  9. JosieJ 08.Nov.08 at 1:16 pm

    Oh my gosh…you are my doppelganger!!!

    Reply

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