Last night I had a most unsatisfying orgasm, which was a first for me. Well not the first unsatisfying orgasm ever, but the first alone. I’m usually really quite good at getting me off. In fact, I’m pretty good in general flying solo or with a partner. I’m not bragging either. It’s the truth, and I’m not afraid to prove it.

However, last night, the mojo was not flowing. After I had finished up practicing, the session coming to its logical conclusion, I rolled over and thought, ‘well that sucked.’

The worst part is, not the bad orgasm but how much it’s bothering me. I have convinced myself that despite all my practice, I’m horribly out of practice and I’ll never have a bone-shattering, breath-taking climax again.

I’m on my way to being a frigid prune. I could weep for my lost sexuality.