I’ve spent a majority of my long weekend either shaping up Supergenius Headquarters or sitting in an emotional funk pondering a relationship that I’m not even involved in. It seems one of my sister’s marriages is kind of on the rocks. If it were my story to tell, I would surely tell it. But it is not my story, and it seems anythin I write about it just brings up more and more and more questions. Questions I cannot answer.
I’m not even the one who might be getting divorced and yet the thought of it just reduces me to tears. I decided late last night that I needed to stop thinking about it. I have no control over someone else’s relationship. And as much as I want them to stay together, there’s nothing I can do or say to change the outcome. I can only accept their decision and cope with it.
The extra-long weekend has been tainted with a bit of melancholy funk, and I spent a lot of time trying to turn off my brain in front of the TV or with a particularly inane book (which was given to me by the Finance Guy I work with). So when I was flipping through the channels this morning (after putting a finishing coat on the table) looking for some Frasier or A Different World reruns. I was unbelievably happy to see that an old rerun of Saturday Night Live was on featuring musical guest, Outkast.
And you know what happened when Outkast came on and Andre 3000 started singing? I danced my ass off. I jumped out of my chair and sang and danced for all I was worth. I felt a little stupid, but then I thought ‘fuck it’ nobody can see me. So i danced, and shook things and it was good, and made me smile.
So I decided today is going to be all about finding the little joys and not thinking about my sister’s shitty marriage.
Also, they just chopped down the tree in my front yard. Right now. Weird.
My sister is going through a divorce and it drains the life out of everyone involved, as said by the eldest selfish sister. Last night I told my sister, “What did you expect? Divorce is ugly. And look, you put more emotional energy into this divorce then you did into the entire marriage.” You can’t help but get drawn into the dark abyss. And if kids are involved, it sucks so much more. All you can do is be the Aunt who dishes out hugs and provides a place where the kids can get away from the insanity of it all.
Who is this mysterious “they”, and why are they chopping down YOUR tree? I’d be for peppering their asses with some bird shot if they tried that in MY yard.