yesterday before i left work, i decided i had to go in early today because of the very much to do that is currently plauging me. which is better, i suppose, than the very lot of meetings to go to, which will be next week. so this morning i got up earler than usual, so i could get to work earlier than usual.

part of my rainman-like morning routine is sitting at my desk before i get dressed, turning on some music (it used to be billy bragg in the morning, but lately it’s been ol’ paul westerberg), reading the New York Times Obituaries and catching up on my Westernerd Message Board. usually i only read, i don’t post or respond to anything.

except today i decided i had to, and apparently this small deviation in my rainman-like routine has thrown the world into chaos. because as i was sitting here i suddenly thought it was 7:56 p.m rather than 7:56 a.m. because i decided it would be a good idea to eat the thin mint girl scout cookies sitting up here from when i was working on The Short Story that was So Shitty it Made the Baby Jesus Weep.

as i popped the cookie into my mouth i thought, “ohh this is chocolately and minty too! yum!” so then i had another cookie. then i realized that it was a little weird. perhaps a bit too minty.

then it hit me. the extra mint was from my toothpaste. i had brushed my teeth and promptly eaten cookies for breakfast. cookies aren’t supposed to be consumed before 8 in the morning, everyone knows that. 10 a.m. yes? 7:56 a.m.? no.

so then i thought to myself, “lady, you are not right in the head.”