rigorous scientific studies

Big Slink & Lil Slink

yesterday, seamus approached me slinking lil slink back and forth between his fingers.

“the minion forgot lil slink,” i said.
“yep,” he said. “i kinda like lil.”
“it doesn’t have the same slink as big slink,” i said. “there’s no way lil could walk downstairs alone or in pairs.”
“but it does make that slinkity sound,” he said.
“well, not as good as big,” i said.

we continued to weight the pros and cons of big slink versus lil.

how we exactly ended up from there to measuring the slinks and comparing and coming up with all these ratios do determine the true slink of big and lil slinky is beyond me right now. i suppose when any great scientific progress is made there is some sort of point of no return that is reached but never recalled.

Scientific Calculations

what proceed was a series of exacting measurments and calculations. there was even a chart made. with each new discovery in the numerical differences between big and lil, seamus and i would grin at each other with pure scientific glee. this is surely how einstein felt when he was stumbling his way toward the theory of relatively.

as seamus scratched the calculations into a rude chart, while punching numbers into his nerdy calculator i documented our progress.

The loop width

after he was done, he looked at our work, tapping his chin with the pencil.

“look at all these numbers,” he said.
“they’re totally impressive,” i said.
“and they must mean something,” he said.

what neither of us were sure. but the chart looked all official. after a little head scratching he started punching more numbers into his calculator. i just watched in rapt attention. i was igor to his mad scientist. just watching the brilliance happen.

“i got it! if you divied H2 by H1 you can get the slink factor.”
“you’re a genius!” i said.

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  1. zook 11.May.05 at 3:31 pm

    What we definitely don’t need to measure is the dink factor. I think it is very clear that it is off the charts 😉

  2. The Hitch/Rolpol 11.May.05 at 5:39 pm

    Hey, what about the JodiChromeySuperGenius slink factor? Pretty damned high, right?

  3. madfox 13.May.05 at 3:32 am

    Did this once with a regular and king size kit kat…


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