there will be no good words here today. i’m drowning in the flood of unbearable, inexplicable sadness and self-pity brought on, i think, by my lack of sleep. i haven’t slept well since i got back from the cabin off of bloody hook lane. perhaps it’s all hormonal with PMS waiting to rear its ugly head until it wasn’t so pre anymore.
all i know is i feel so wretched. i’m in one of those moods where i’m pretty sure if i just stopped being, nobody on earth would even notice. it’s terrible. it’s totally self-indulgent, and probably, perhaps ridiculous, but that doesn’t make the feeling any less real.
maybe i’m just going through some sort of what does it all mean phase. i’m just really tired of pretending to be so fucking happy all the time. my face is tired of smiling. mostly i think i just need to get laid. because, i can’t imagine what could be sexxier than an insecure, pouting 32-year-old woman.
argh. i don’t know what it is. i feel stuck and sad and needing of some serious male attention and that makes me angry that i need that. because i already have absolutely fabulous girlfriends and they make me feel wonderful, but i need some serious male attention and i don’t know how or why it’s different, but there i said it. that’s what i need. i just want to feel adored, and i think that’s why i miss the TTHM so much because he always made me feel adored even though it wasn’t romantic at all. and now that he’s fallen off the face of the earth, i need someone new to fill that roll.
so yeah, who wants to adore me?
The line to adore you has already stretched into a Disney-esque queue. We all adore you, Jodi.
then how come i don’t feel it?
even tho i don’t comment nearly as often as i check in, i adore you too jodi!!! damn those hormones! argh!!!
I just ran across this blog a few weeks ago while I was searching for, of all things, the phone number for Great Mandarin in EP. After I didn’t find it here, I moved on. But something tickled the back of my brain, caused me to come back and read the main page the following day.
I’ve been hooked ever since. I don’t know what it is. It might be just the novelty of finding someone in the neighborhood who is great at blogging. Or maybe the wonderful way you write about some of the mundane things in life. Or even just my strange fascination with the background image, trying to decide if the blue snowflake-like shape is the primary pattern or the light blue webbing.
So, I guess in a manner of speaking, you’ve captured my adoration in record time.
Even the happiest people around us have to have down days. If they didn’t have down days, they wouldn’t think happy days were all that special!
Read this. You’ll feel better. Maybe.
The Jodi Adoration Society needs to be lay it’s foundations! I would start a yahoo club or something if it didn’t smack of general creepiness. Hang in there Jodi!
ben you screwed up my comments. but i won’t hold it against you, mostly because i adore boys named ben.
I haven’t been promoted yet, I’m still “Colonel Creepy”, thank you.
And my blog is an unofficial tribute to Jodi.