twisted numbers

number of books extracted from bed and surrounding area: 7
number of issues of the new yorker extracted from aforementioned area: 3
number of book jackets inexplicably and inextractably wedged between bed frame and bed post: 1
number of expletives uttered during unwedging process: 36
number of expletives uttered upon hearing the tear of paper as book jacket becomes unwedged: 394

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