so i came home from an evening with the girls and i was gonna write about how reenergizing it was. how we laughed. how i felt light and happy driving home through the night singing paul westerberg songs like i was on stage in the main room at first ave.
but then i come home and read an e-mail from someone who clearly thinks i am a fuckwit and the mood is ruined. now i am going to go to bed and cry a bit. make some decisions and hope i feel better in the morning.
i am so very angry right now. the kind of anger where you leak steamy tears, then you get angrier because you are crying.
i am a smart girl. i don’t always act it. sometimes i even hide it. but i am smart. there are many things i am not, i don’t deny it. but i am smart– not the smartest, there are many much more intelligent than i. but i can hold my own pretty well. intelligence is the one area in my life where my self-esteem is rather high.
blargh. there is no point to this ranting. my feelings have been hurt and i believe my intelligence has been questioned. you know, all i ever wanted to do was help. it just seems that when you offer yourself up, volunteer to help you get shit on.
why?
do i really come off as that dumb?
Honey I don’t think you’re dumb at all. Usually, when you offer advice, or to help someone, and they turn around and stab you, it’s because perhaps you’re saying what they DIDN’T want to hear. Like the truth. People get angry when you call them on their shit. Otherwise, sometimes it can be scary to accept help from someone, and I know that I’ve lashed out in the past, biting the hand that feeds me, so to speak.
I have no idea what this person said to you, but rest assured that it’s THEIR shit, not yours. Okay? I know. Doesn’t make it much better, at least not right away. I wish we didn’t all automatically take things so personally, and assume it’s because WE’RE bad. Not that the other person is bad, but, again, this is their shit, not yours. They have to live with the fact that you reached out, and they fucked you by saying something not nice.
Their loss.
help a friend or a maybe-friend and forever see them cross the street when they see you comin’!
post the e-mail! post the e-mail!
As a rather new visitor to your site (can’t even remember who’s site I came from, maybe Swallowing Tacks), I have to say you don’t sound dumb at all. You sound bubbly and full of life, which, to the undiscerning eye and look dumb, but well, who needs ’em? The world needs more happy smart people, and fewer dark, depressing “tortured geniuses”. Keep up the good work, and don’t let those who can’t see beyond the happy get you down.
as usual, my suggestion to you: stop being such a baby.
No, Jodi, you don’t come off as dumb at all. I think Paige is dead-on in saying that you probably wrote something the other didn’t like, and so that person resorted by picking on you.
I’m sorry. I think it’s the particular “borne cross” for nice people to be sensitive, too, so I know that e-mail stung. But, really, don’t blame yourself. Does more harm than good, and ultimately serves no purpose. Don’t give the meanie the satisfaction of knowing it hurt.
Jodi, don’t you let anybody make you feel dumb. People say things like that out of all sorts of mostly self-defeating reasons and, if anything, whoever said that to you should be pitied for their obvious lack of intelligence.
yea, i agree with dangerman. post the e-mail, post the e-mail.
You already know what I think. Some people can just be insensitive, but that doesn’t mean you should take it personally. And sometimes I really think that this particular person is emotionally stunted. (okay so that’s the pot calling the kettle black there but anyway…) I think if you smack him around verbally a little via e-mails, he’ll come to his senses. The question is whether you want to go through that trouble. But either way, DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY! It’s his lack of people skills, not you.
its been a while jodi–but im back to participating a little
i’m dumb–and if you ever need to regain intelligence-confidence just drop me an email. i can make you feel smarter in no time with my surefire unsmartness.
guaranteed
theres alot of people out there who will hide behind a screen and say hurtful things…just remember, there’s also that many Nascar fans…(helps me)