upon being asked if everything is ok:
i am fine, but not ok.

i am sick of winter and sick of being here and sick of being lonely and bored, i am angry at being such a big baby. i hate not fitting in with the new crew at work yet. i am impatient and my impatience is making me angry.

my sister hurt my feelings last week. . . and just the fact that i remember it makes me pathetic.

it’s been weeks since i’ve been touched by another human being. i need a hug, i need some sunshine, i need a vacation from my brain.

i can’t sleep very much or very well. i am always tired.

kari had an orange-haired baby boy and i am jealous.

i am lazy and uninspired and restless and sick of my surroundings.

somedays i can convince myself that nobody would even notice if i
disappeared. which means i could probably get a three-day head start.

i want to runaway or get lost.

i make no sense at all.