my uterus and i have decided that we will marry the first person who eschews that traditional diamond-ring bullshit and insteads presents us with a vat of Funky Chunky Popcorn. this stuff is sin in…
Posts tagged Crushes & Romantic Notions
once i thought my innocence was gone, now i know that happiness goes on
the summer before i was in 7th (or it might have been 8th) grade i spent most of my time here in Shakopee (where i live now), instead of home in Blaine (a suburb on…
things that have recently come to my attention
1. if i could have dirty, dirty sex with mick jagger’s voice (and not him, because he’s kinda old, even though his snaky hips are dead sexy), i would. 2. i’ve officially started the procrastination…
makin’ whoopee
i think kathleen turner overdrive is mocking me. playing ‘turning japanese’ right after ‘makin’ whoopee!’ yeah, even my iPod thinks it’s funny that i can’t seem to get laid.
listen here young lady all that matters is what makes you happy
my friend jason once told me i have a trademark jodi smirk. i call it my smarmy crushgrin. it’s a smile that cannot be kicked off my face and it totally tells everyone that i…
hope grows greener than grass stains
dear Carl, i was just listening to “Letter from an Occupant” for about the 39,921st time in the last little while here. today instead of making it shake my ass, it instead nearly made me…