So then we came to the end. Wouldn’t it be poetic if this were the last post I ever made? After nineteen years I just peaced out after 200 days in a row? Technically, I didn’t make it 200 days in a row. I missed seven days — a few around Christmas, one when I was sick, one I totally forgot.

The best part of this project has been that it reminded me how much I like to blog, especially the vapid, mindless thoughts of the day type of blogging.

In other news, today was much better. People reached out to say they’re sorry I’m so blue and to remind me I don’t suck. It’s so very kind and thoughtful I get choked up when I think about. The Internet is a cesspool of trolls and awfulness, but through some sort of grace I have cultivated a small group of kind, thoughtful people to follow around the zeros and ones.

In still other news, the Joan Jett documentary “Bad Reputation” is on Hulu, and I watched it while eating a green curry chicken noodle soup I made with Walter (who is here for the next nine days) snuggled next to me the couch.

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I do not want to write tonight, but it’s the penultimate post of the 200 project, so here I am.

Today I’ve been unconsolably sad, pretty lonely, and struggling with being a chump. A sucker. Someone who is frequently only called upon when they are useful to someone but not so much worthy of attention when not being useful.

I’ve had one friendship come to an end because once my friend was in a good, happy relationship she no longer had time for me. When I turned to her for support after Paco died the same week I suffered a romantic upset and the only thing she talked about was her new boyfriend I knew I was on my way out. Sister #3 is still cold-shouldering me since I told her I felt like she and The Tibbles use me. My point being proven today when I heard from them for the first time since Christmas because they needed a ride.

There are more examples of my chumpiness & being used, but I already feel like I’m cryptoblogging. Plus, I’m so down in the dumps I’m prone to making melodramatic statements about disappearing that will only embarrass me in the morning. Or March.

The post Day 199 of 200: Penultimate appeared first on I Will Dare.

SPOILER: It’s me. I’m the worst client I have.

I say this having finally mostly completed the latest update to my portfolio site. Mostly completed, because there’s a lot I want to fix, but it’s completed enough to take down the maintenance screen that’s been up since. . . oh. . . the January 19th. Perfect is the enemy of done, right?

Why am I the worst client? I’m super picky, indecisive, impatient, and hate everything 12 minutes after I’ve done it. What also makes me the worst? I rarely update my portfolio. In my head I update it whenever things get slow. It’s part of the panic process, remember? But according to the stupid site I just finished, it hadn’t really been updated since 2015. Oh, remember how great 2015 was?

In other news, there is no other news. It snowed a ton of inches today and I had to cancel CSA Supperclub. I made pork ramen anyway, and now my stomach hurts because I ate too much pork. Also, I am super tired because apparently I have to wake up every morning at five a.m. to pee and then not fall back to sleep for like an hour. I’m not a fan of this nonsense.

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Today, @Citesomething posted the most magical tweet of the year.

I saw the picture and a shiver of excitement ran up my spine. I loved the Scholastic Book Fair. I also loved Scholastic book orders. In fact, I remember the very last book I got from a Scholastic book order. It was Sweet Valley High #4 Power Play where Jessica and Elizabeth fight about fat Robin joining the Pi Betas. It’s about how fat shaming is totally a good method to get a girl to lose weight and that you will only be accepted if you’re not such a fatty.

Not my favorite in the oeuvre.

I got the book in seventh grade and remember Mr. Johnson handing it to me in English class because Cam Anderson, whom I loved, made fun of it because it looked like the girls on the cover were gonna kiss. Yeah.

I also remember getting this in particular because it’s the only book in my SVH that didn’t have the red Bantam rooster on the spine and instead had some Scholastic thing. This still, 34 years later, bothers the crap out of me.

The post Day 197 of 200: The Last Book I Got from a Book Order appeared first on I Will Dare.

In case you missed it, the State of the Union was on tonight. If you feel bad about this, just watch this “Union of the Snake” video by Duran Duran. It is more coherent and honest than Turnip’s speech. And the main refrain of this song is Voices in your body coming through on the radio. The union of the snake is on the climb.

The video also features a weird lizard man who has more realistic coloring than the Turnip. So there’s that too.

As to be expected, the actual State of the Union address was self-aggrandizing bullshit full of racism, sexism, and lies. Much like our union, so I guess on a symbolic level the address was totally legit.

The best part of the whole ordeal was Nancy Pelosi. Not only did she have her active bitch face going, she spent time picking up pieces of paper and reading them because she had no time for his bullshit. Plus, she clapped at Trump like he is the dumbest piece of shit ever. Which he is. She’s not wrong. Oh, and Stacey Abrams who is amazing and makes me think there might be some hope for our garbage nation.

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