A little bit of heaven & A whole lot of hell
At the beginning of April my niece, Jaycie, asked us to participate in the 30-Day Song Challenge on Instagram. For posterity, I am documenting the songs I chose here. This is what I did today. All day. I’m not the least bit ashamed, it was kind of fun for me digging through old songs and old posts on I Will Dare. Not too shabby for…
Another month, another lost gig, but I changed the font on the COVID Diaries graphic, so that’s exciting. I’m down again today, like really, truly, bluely down and not Mean Reds down. I’ve been weepy for two days over everything from Charles’ impending departure to being so weepy. Yesterday morning as the sun shined in from the window I wept for a good 15 minutes…
In a recent blog post, the author stated she was sad. Upon further reflection she has decided it would be more accurate to describe her emotional state as “mean red” as defined by Holly Golightly in the book (and movie, which the header quote is from, the book mentions sweating and the author believes that we don’t need to talk about sweating at this unprecedented…
I am sad today. Last year when her daughter was struggling with mental health, BFK explained the irrational behavior to me. “She has all these thoughts and emotions floating around in her like balloons,” BFK said. “She keeps grasping at one balloon and tying it to brick even if they don’t match. She’s constantly trying to tie the emotions to something concrete.” That’s me today….
The #1 reason I created I Will Dare back in 2000 and why I’ve kept at it for 20 years is because it amuses me. A lot. I was a lonely 28-year-old customer service rep living in a shitty apartment, I needed something to amuse me. A lot. I Will Dare checks all my boxes. It lets me try my hand at graphic design, writing,…
Am I going to blog about a dream I had like I’m 15 and it’s 1987 and I’m writing with purple marker in a notebook with pink paper? YOU BET YOUR SWEET ASS I AM! Last night I dreamt I went to a library. Not any library I can remember ever being in, but it was wonderful — full of books and people. It was…
I lost my first client today for COVID-related reasons. Lost might be a bit of reach. I’ve been paused. I suspect there is a lot of pausing in my future and I’m doing my best not to panic about it. So instead of stress-blogging about my road to financial ruin I will tell you about a small, good thing. Usually sometime during the weekend my…
I suppose it was the very definition of hubris. My cocky self-assurance that Cade was going to thrive here at Aunt Jodi’s House for Wayward Nephews. I thought all he needed was a safe, secure, steady home removed from the trauma and substance abuse at home. In my magical thinking all he needed was all the love in my heart, a ton of of therapy,…
Oh Darling Ones! This has been the roughest week. I don’t even know where to begin on what shitty thing happened on which nameless day. Cade’s been having some behavior problems, and it’s hard. So hard. I don’t know how you parents do it. Like how do you keep pushing down that anger when the kid is being utterly ridiculous and taking really, really stupid…
I shaved off all my hair again. As you can see in the picture above I look almost exactly how I looked in 2018. There may be a few more wrinkles around my eyes, but other than that. . . Anyway, remember how I sent the nephews to the grocery store on Friday? That was probably not my smartest move. I didn’t think about how…