Things that dismayed The Tibbles today (abridged)

  • I wouldn’t let them have any coffee even though they really love coffee and they know because I let them dunk their fingers in my cold, hours old coffee that one time.
  • My singing, specifically how I “know all the words to all the songs. The bad songs.”
  • Sharing chocolate milk.
  • The fact that I wouldn’t go in the garage to poke at a dead mouse.
  • The vetoing of the McDonalds for lunch bill.
  • How I made them wash their hands “a hundred fifty times” every time they came back upstairs to report on the mouse and its aliveness or deadness.
  • My adamant discrediting of the string cheese theory. The theory? If they gave the dead mouse string cheese they could adequately discern if it was actually just playing dead or if it was hungry.
  • How I never ever let them go to Skateville even though I’ve never even heard that word pass their lips until today, thirty minutes before their stepmom was to come pick them up.
  • I kept trying to talk to them while they were watching “Curious George” and don’t I know that Curious George is good for kids because some kids might not know how you can squeeze your hand between your pointer finger and your thumb and that helps get rid of headaches.
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