If you lived in my head this is what you would hear

Well I married my dreamgirl
I married my dreamgirl
But she didn’t tell me her credit was bad
So now instead of living in a pleasant suburb
We’re living in the basement at her mom and dad’s
No we can’t get a loan for a respectable home
Just because my girl defaulted on some old credit cards
If we had gone to free credit report dot com
I’d be a happy bachelor with a dog and a yard

So I had to type the lyrics because you can’t find the commercial on YouTube. I am so disappointed. The Internet has let me down.

Also, I haven’t started my short story that is due on Wednesday. Also, I can’t sleep anymore but I try, lord knows, I try. In fact I am going to try again right now! Well, after I finish My Date with Satan (only one story left). Also, tomorrow night is the Jim Walsh reading so I better get some writing done between now and then.

Also, I am fucked, figuratively, not literally.

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  1. UH 27.Nov.07 at 8:40 am

    I love the idea that the guy would have dumped his fiancee if he’d only known she’d defaulted on some old credit cards.

    What a cad.

  2. Joe 10.Dec.07 at 4:52 pm


    Let’s start by counting how many stereotypes about women were packed into that little number:

    1. Women are crazy spenders who run up massive credit card debt on frivolous shit (because this couldn’t be “cute” if she’d defaulted on medical bills or some other necessity).

    2. Women are financially irresponsible (i.e. running up debt they can’t afford).

    3. Women can’t be trusted (with credit cards, to be honest, etc.).

    4. Women are scheming liars who trick men into marrying them (in this case, by hiding debt).

    Not bad for 30 seconds and fewer than 90 words.

    And that’s to say nothing of the commentary on the man who married his “dream girl,” only to find out he’d been swindled. Despite having discovered she’s dishonest—and wishing he’d uncovered his otherwise perfect dream girl’s imperfections before they got hitched, so he could have just gotten himself a dog instead—he’s sticking it out. Yay, sanctity of marriage!

    He’s not going to let her forget it, though, is he? (Watch him give her smug, hectoring looks and shake his head at her each time she walks by.) Nope, having assumed that debt like some Bizarro World dowry, he’s going to make sure he gets his money’s worth! As B&L point out, “the ‘woman [is] working off her debt to the man’ by doing laundry while he’s standing around playing the soundtrack with his little boy band—it’s like a horrible nightmare that you just keep vainly hoping is parodical.”

    But of course it isn’t.

    And there’s yet another layer of objectionable commentary running through this ad, underlining the pernicious principle that defines our value as individuals by inextricably linking it to our value as consumers. Part of what this guy is so fucked off about is that they should be in a nice house in the suburbs, but aren’t—”should be,” based on some mysterious arbitrary measure probably resembling something very close to the oh-so-American credo: “If someone else has it, you should have it, too.” They don’t have a “respectable home,” defined, naturally, not by the quality of the family within in, but its square footage.

    You know what they say—a happy family is all about location, location, location!

    This advert is truly a perfect example of the media we consume all the time, which totally looks like No Big Deal at first blush—but, when you just scratch at the surface a bit, the seemingly innocuous veneer pulls back to reveal a very pointed reinforcement of several disagreeable narratives. Being part of this culture means we’re just steeped in this kind of stuff all the time, uncritically internalizing messages that are pretty darn objectionable, when you come right down to it. When I stop to consider how much of this stuff we absorb just in the process of going about our average days, I feel quite despondent at the thought that, without vigilance, we’re essentially giant sponges for intellectual shit.

    No wonder so many people treat others like garbage, when our heads are filled with rubbish.

  3. Joe 10.Dec.07 at 4:53 pm

    sorry, the above email was wrong…there’s no “k” in it

  4. Andy 09.Jan.08 at 3:35 am

    I hate that jingle – but the part that makes me chuckle is the last part about the “pleasant suburb.” I truly regret that he’s not there, because it’s certain he wouldn’t be anywhere near me.

  5. Josi 01.Jul.08 at 3:59 pm

    Other things not mentioned here – what’s wrong with HIS credit that they can’t get a loan? Really, I mean – I was married before and my husband is the one whose credit they were really worried about, mine was just a blip.

    But to basically have a commercial biting on somebody as not worthy of a relationship, love or marriage due to their credit is poor, poor, poor. Even poorer than how poor you’d be to have bad credit.

    Rather than be with someone he supposedly loved enough to marry, now he can’t have the house of his dreams, his woman made some poor credit choices, and if he’d known all that – his choice would have been to have a dog and that house? Well – buddy – if you can get that house WITHOUT the girl – then you can get it WITH the girl (something I believe the advertisers missed?)…

    It just leaves a REALLY bad taste in my mouth. I HAD good credit and a “respectable home” – it sure as hell didn’t make my relationship any better. My ex’s great credit didn’t make him a great guy.

  6. Lit Prof 09.Sep.08 at 9:51 am

    I am particularly infuriated by the sexism of the “dream girl” commercial. Not only does it imply that women are financially irresponsible it implies that a financial mistake is a reason for a man not to marry. In a way, this gestures toward the dowry system once practiced in the U.S. and still used in other countries, for if woman does not improve man’s financial situation she has no worth, as her practices will continue to drain him. Moreover, the commercial explicitly shows the woman working in the household doing laundry–another implication that she is a drain on income, as she plays the traditional housewife role. It’s 2008 and this commercial would have us believe it’s the no later than 1950.


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