Sister #4 told me tonight that she might be moving out. it seems when we talked finances the other night she finally realized that she’s living way beyond her means. apparently she talked about it all with Sister #3, and they decided it would be a good idea if she moves in with Sister #3 and her family.
i’m totally stunned. it’s like what i’ve wanted since i moved in here. to live by myself. but now that it might happen i’m totally, totally scared shitless. i’m not sure i can afford this place all on my own. well, i probably can afford it, i just won’t have room for all the luxuries i’ve grown so used to — gone would be the daily visits to iTunes and weekly deliveries from Amazon.
since she dropped the news, i can’t decide if i should be elated or terrified. i’m really, really afraid of being poor again. growing up, we were incredibly poor. so poor, that i still don’t even talk about it. i don’t ever want to live like that. now, if Sister #4 moves out i’m afraid i’ll be that poor again.
of course she’s worried about leaving me high and dry too. but i can’t hold her back. i mean if i had to work two jobs just to get by, i think i’d die.
blech. now i have a headache.