my back is killing me. i’m having a hard time laying, standing, sitting and doing pretty much anything but bitching about my aching back. i think the soreness is directly related to having spent roughly three hours yesterday with my ass on a nice, cement curb in hutchinson waiting with bated breath for one princess jaycie to come marching by with her cheer squad.

in honor of princess jaycie and the father’s of my family, we gathered in hutch to watch the annual father’s day parade. i’m not sure if that’s the actual name of the parade, but that’s what i called it.

i’m not sure what was the worst part, the achey back/ass from sitting on the ground, the mild concussion from being pelted in the head with 392 tootsie rolls tossed out from the passing john deere tractors, or the horrible flashback i keep having after being accosted by the worlds scariest clown.

much trauma to be had at a parade.

of course, as with any gathering of my familial tribe, there was much hilarity to outshine the trauma. there was sister #4’s constant commentary on all the upcoming floats (someone had given her a parade program) and what number we were on in the 144-float spectacle, there was max’s color commentary and general enthusiasm (“grodyjodi that princess waved at me!”– which was actually funny all 67 times he said it) and then the spider incident.

“there’s a spider on your shoulder,” i said pointing to sister #2’s shoulder.
“get it off!” she said in her scared voice while making a scared face. i reached over, scooped up the spider, and placed it on the ground.
“why didn’t you just smoosh it?” she asked.
“they’re all god’s creatures,” i said.

ten minutes and 14 princesses later she glances behind me and then does a double take.

“there’s a snake behind you,” she said.
“ahhh!” i scream jumping up and holding my butt to ensure that the snake was not attached to my ass. “kill it! kill it!”
“why? it’s one of god’s creatures,” she blurts out and then rolls to her side laughing.

not funny. not funny at all.

(no snakes or spiders were harmed in the making of this post. in fact, there was no snake at all– bitch).