i’ve spent the day locked in my loneliness feeling as thought i fell off the face of the earth and everyone forgot to notice. the weather agreed with me, rainy, cold and very mid-october in minnesota, so i just went with the mood. i’m not good company anyway. the combination of PMS, work worries, sadness, and stress makes me utterly unbearable, even to myself.
i don’t know what to do about the TTHM and the more i think about the more i don’t know what to do. we haven’t talked in weeks. he hasn’t called and doesn’t respond to my e-mails (3 of them i think). he’s supposed to go with me to the lucinda williams concert on saturday (the 18th). do i suck it up and call him? do i just chalk it up to another man who disappeared from my life without an explanation? tell me, tell me what i should do.
in other alarming news, i’ve come to the realization that i can’t match clothes. really, at all. today i went shopping for some clothes for the kidlings’ birthdays (princess jaycie bugs turned 6 on the 4th and my precious max will be 5 on the 25th). sister #2 made an announcement that new toys were not welcome. it seems they have enough toys to entertain a small village filled with four and five year olds. so i went in search of clothes, since that’s what they need (the toy embargo will be lifted in time for christmas i am assured).
yeah, not so good with the clothes matching. you know if it gets outside of blue jeans and some sort of gray/red/yellow/orange shirt, i’m fucked. i hope what i got them matches, i haven’t a clue. i am sure the sister club will inform me of any heinous fashion mistakes tomorrow at the birthday party.
also, i’ve become frumpy auntlady. it seems that all clothes made for little girls are manufactured by the same companies who make hookerwear. i’m not kidding. there’s not reason my six-year-old niece needs a catholic school girl outfit complete with plunging neckline ala britney spears. i was appalled. she got a nice pink hooded sweater and some jeans. max got something along the same lines, but in boy colors of grey and green.
and since i am a bad, bad, aunt bad lady, there will be toys– sea monkeys for max, a strawberry shortcake craft kit for jaycie. ha!
Jaycee’s birthday is November 4th??? That’s my birthday too!
it’s actually october 4th.
Do you have both tickets? If so, take someone else and enjoy. One of my professors just saw Lucinda in New Haven and said she was amazing. (And some of her songs will make you feel better. I don’t think she sings “Abandoned” in concert but God, that song just kills me, it’s what I listen to over & over when I am heartbroken.) And I am sorry about the TTHM. Guys do that. I don’t know why.
I’d tell my sister not to buy toys for my kids, but she always did, anyway, and it was always something that had a million pieces. And she is their favorite aunt. (Well, she’s kind of their only aunt, since they don’t see their father’s side of the family more than once every few years. But still.)
My niece’s birthday is October 4th also and also 6 – I sent Powerpuff paraphenalia – I am a bad aunt too.
Lucinda is really rocking – I agree you should take someone else and just have an awesome time. TTHM doesn’t deserve you as a friend if he can’t even send a short note in response to you.
About the TTHM: didja check the obits?
nah, i’m pretty sure he’s still alive because he still checks into iwilldare.com on occassion.
i must admit i haven’t called him since we last talked a few weeks ago. i was trying to leave him alone since he was so busy and now, well, i just don’t know if i should call or just let sleeping dogs go off into the wilderness to die, you know?
Just call him up, say hi, and ask, “are we still on for Lucinda?” There’s no reason you shouldn’t know!
yeah, but see i’ve spent all weekend obsessing about it and blown it up into this big huge thing which is utterly ridiculous i know, but somehow i have convinced myself that i can’t handle the disappointment i’ll hear in his voice when he picks up the phone and hears it’s me. or worse what if he forgot who i was?
Oh Jodi. I’m giving up.
i gave up long ago.