let’s hope we don’t have to do that for another 30 years

i dunno what my problem is, but i’m kinda still bitter about the hoo-ha last night. it was good. mom was surprised, there was a good turnout, but a few bad things spoiled the whole event.

first there was the uninvited, unknown drunks who stumbled into our gathering from the bar while i was in the bathroom. upon my return, these drunks took it upon themselves to shout, “SHE’S FUCKING HUGE” and various other size-related epithets that i didn’t hear. sister #2 immediately sprung into action, having them forcibly removed, while sister #3 restrained her husband from beating the crap out of them for making fun of me.

then of course there was my drunk mother. my mom hasn’t been drunk since sister #2’s wedding, some 7 or so years ago. but last night, mom hung one on, which lead her to tell me how much she loved me (cool), that she’d give her life for me (weird) and then she launched into this diatribe about how she worries incessantly about me because i’m all alone (thanks).

so yeah, i was pretty damn grumpy about the whole thing. i mean, fucking a. not only do i have to deal with the public humiliation of name-calling, i have to hear how my mom worries that nobody’s ever gonna love me.

so that sucked and i’ve been feeling pretty much like pond-scum today– even though the TTHM did call and make me feel a little better for a little while by saying nice things, i still feel like crying and crying and not stopping for a long, long while (i don’t think PMS is helping the situation at all). but i’m not crying. i’m not crying, though my eyes have burned 100 times today thinking about it all. i haven’t cried yet, but i’m afriad when i slow down for more than 10 minutes the tears will come and there ain’t gonna be nothing i can do to stop them.

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2 Comments

  1. dainec 13.Jul.03 at 10:36 pm

    Yuck, yuck, yuck. Those drunk people were idiots.

    The thing that stands out to me is that you have so many people who would fight for you… who have righteous indignation on your behalf, because they love you so much.

    Keep your mom’s comments in perspective. Believe you me, moms always have something to say about how their kids’ lives are going. (I’m trying really hard to avoid being like that when my kids are grown. And now, too, actually.) The fact that she was a little tipsy made her bolder than she ought to be.

    I’ve been happily married for 17 years, so my mom doesn’t worry about *that*. But she still has opinions/worries about my kids, especially my daughter’s body size. It pushes my buttons, but I do my best to remind myself that her intentions are good.

    Get some rest, enjoy some more undating, and think about all of us who think you’re pretty darned groovy.

  2. dweebie 14.Jul.03 at 4:44 pm

    Well I know you’ll take this to heart since it was said by Chuck Woolery of Naturally Stoned, you know “Love Connection” guy, well he said his father said never, never worry about what other people think. Only worry about what you think. You can only control what you think, so that’s what you worry about. Let them worry about themselves.

    Plus when you think they’re thinking something, they may not be thinking what you think they are, so then you’re just wasting all your energy with that worrying. When it’s obvious what they’re thinking, when they shout out something about being tall or something, still let them worry about it, no need to waste your time, you still don’t know whether to them that’s cool or not. I love pop psychology and celebrities. 😉