aunt anna: so what does cathy (her youngest sister, my white-trash aunt who lives with my parents) do on the interent?
sister #4: she looks at porn.
aunt anna: ha! no really.
sister #4: really, i am not kidding.
aunt anna: are you sure?
sister #4: really, i am not kidding.
me: you want me to check?
anna: you can do that?
me: heck yeah.

so i pull a chair up to owen and caress his keyboard lovingly. . . remember, owen was my first. i click on the history and it blooms with cheesy xxx links

anna: oh my god! she’s so weird.
me: well, what can i say?
anna: click on one, i’ve never looked at internet porn
me: what?
anna: i wanna see it

so i click on one of the links and neekid breasts, cum shots and sexxy teens appear on the screen. my mom and sister #2 join us at the computer

anna: ok, now click on one of those
me: which one?
anna: i don’t care, i just want to see what it’s like.

so i click on something called young teen sluts or cheerleaders exposed or something

anna: not the young ones, that’s bad. we should be looking at the old ones.
me: there ain’t any old ones here. i can’t believe i am looking at internet porn with my mom and my aunt.
sister #2: this is unreal.

so yes, that’s how we spent my mom’s 50th birthday. looking for porn.