Hi Darling Ones, As I type we’re in overtime during the Warroad v. Mahtomedi semi-final game in the 2022 Boys State High School Hockey Tournament. Whenever I worry that I’m emotionally dead inside I need to remember how I feel when we hit OT during holy week. My heart beats faster. I can feel the blood in my veins. I’m anxious and afraid to blink. My heart rate spikes whenever a team gets into scoring position. Last night, via text,…
Dearest Darling Ones, Thanks to childhood trauma and a heavy assist from poor self-esteem I have a phobia about being forgotten and/or abandoned. My mom’s go-to for everything she didn’t do or feel like doing was “I forgot.” This applied to everything from lunch money to attending school plays to putting down the deposit to reserve my place in the freshman class at college. My dad was a big fan of abandonment as a form of punishment, which isn’t exactly…
Dear Darling Ones, I’m not doing very well. I’ve fallen into a swamp of seasonal/situational depression and I haven’t found my way out of it yet. I’m labeling it depression though that doesn’t feel right. Mostly I’m cranky all the fucking time and out of sorts. I don’t know how to get back into sorts. Nothing I try is working. Patience seems to be the only cure for what ails me and there’s nothing I hate more than being patient….
Hi Darling Ones, It’s no secret there’s a deep river of venomous rage running just below my skin. Frankly, the fact that I don’t breath fire or have snakes for hair surprises me on the regular. The filter between the rage and world outside of my skin grows ever thinner as the world continues to burn. The rage filter was pretty thick until the 2016 election and things went really downhill from there for obvious and relentless reasons. Some people…
Hi Darling Ones, A few weeks ago on a Zoom with one of my clients, she looked into the camera, sighed heavily, and said, “Who knew the apocalypse would take so long?” Her thought was so brilliant and spot on that I shared it with everyone I knew. When I told BFK, she said, “I was promised a flash of white light and then nothing.” At the time I laughed. Nuclear war was hilarious a month ago. Today, not so…
Dear Darling Ones, Today I called my BFK on the phone at 9:01 in the a.m. “Hey,” she answered tentatively. “I NEED HELP!” I shouted. “Ok. What’s going on?” “My smoke alarm is chirping every – ” CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP “Did you hear that?” “Yeah,” she said laughing. “I don’t know what to do.” I said. “I disconnected the smoke detectors took out the batteries – ” CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP. “And now the wires are chirping, and I’m too afraid…
