sister #3 sent this e-mail:
I had my first Dr. appt for BabyBecker #3. During the appt, she couldn’t find the heartbeat with the Doppler thing. It might mean that the baby died, it might mean that the baby is hiding from us. We really don’t know.

tomorrow she goes for an ultrasound to see if the baby is still with us. doctor miller did say that sister #3’s uterus is growing and i guess that’s a good sign.

i can’t remember the last time i’ve been this heartbroken. with all the baby troubles my J-friends have had this year, you’d think i could become accustomed to such news. but i’m not, my heart is still breaking at the thought of losing this kidling i haven’t even met yet.

i’m just so scared i can’t even think straight. i know i ask a lot of you, darlingones, but this one time if you could just say a little prayer or whatever it is you do for sister #3 and babybecker #3 i’d really appreciate it.