my reward for doing nothing is sleeping not at all. perhaps it was the inadvertent nap while trying to watch the origing “vanilla sky” called open your eyes. i couldn’t stay awake and found myself waking on the couch at 8 o’clock. now it’s 3:30 and no matter what i do my mind does not want to rest. i’m at a loss– for words, things to do, people who would not be offended/paniced/angered by a call. . . such is the life of an insomniac.

i tried to watch Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, but it was annoying the piss out of me, though i was delightfully surprised to realize even bald johnny depp is damn hot.

i tried to listen to music with the lights off, but that just succeeded in getting me stuck in melancholy and loneliness.

i tried a cold shower, masturbation, reading, writing, and nothing has worked thus far.

if i had to work tomorrow, i’d be really pissed off right now.