“jodi why did you stop writing,” the TTHM asked.
“because.”
“why?”
“because i can’t be honest.”
“why?”
“because it makes me think too much and too hard.”
“you have to keep writing.”
“you have to stop asking such hard questions.”

i have many things to say. too many things to say. i can’t quite get them organized in my head and then out my fingers. instead, i lay atop my bed in a sleep pose, breathing deeply in and out, pretending i am napping. my eyes are closed and i might appear asleep to anyone who would care to look, but i am not. in fact laying there, curled up on my side with the comforter pulled up to my chin i am more active than i’ve been in a week. there is so much tumbling around inside that even I can’t get it to stop and make sense. it just jumps around aimlessly, so many good lines that i flash by.

tonight, i will try.