Your eyes don’t look fraudulent. A little blue never hurt anyone.
Thomas
08.May.03 at 10:19 am
Both are yummy… I’ll take a little from column A and from column B, please…
Anonymous
08.May.03 at 11:37 am
thomas, if you’ve already given your heart to another why are you writing all this mushy stuff to Jodi???? Give her a break, she deserves more than some guy cheating vicariously with her online, knowing full well he’s not going to go through with it, even though you may be trying to help. Also give the woman you’ve given your heart to a break by not sharing it with someone else over the internet!!!!!
Thomas
08.May.03 at 12:01 pm
I’ve been in support of Jodi for some time, and she knows I’m in a comitted relationship. Jodi and my wife both also know I think that Jodi is a vibrant, beautiful, articulate and interesting person. Jodi deserves so much, but sometimes she’s hard on herself; I’m there to let her know how desirable she really is. She knows I live too far away, am married, too Republican/Libertarian, etc. I still stand behind all my comments.
Anonymous
08.May.03 at 3:38 pm
You live too far away for what, to cheat on your wife? there’s a creepy factor here.
Thomas
08.May.03 at 3:45 pm
Obviously you didn’t read the entire list of reasons; Distance is only one of the many.
I would give your views a little more weight, but someone who is too chicken-shit to leave their name and real email address should never be taken seriously.
Anonymous
08.May.03 at 5:22 pm
If the creep factor is there, I don’t want to give you my name and email address. Maybe you should work on giving all that support to your spouse and let Jodi find someone who is full time available to get close to. It’s not that you shouldn’t be supportive, but you’re doing in it sexual come on way. only in my humble, chicken shit opinion. Profanity is the crutch of the verbally handicapped, but freedom of speech rocks.
Thomas
09.May.03 at 6:12 am
Freedom of speech does indeed rock, but only a coward hides behind it using a veil of anonymity.
Would that you were omniscient, then you’d have all the facts. But you don’t. I don’t even need to tell you the facts as you’re not directly involved. So as it is, you’re judging me in an open forum without knowing the entire situation, which is none of your business in the first place. Publicly attacking me doesn’t reinforce your opinion or make it any more valid. It just makes it “hate speech”, which you’re still quite well within your rights to spew with as much venom as you can muster.
I think the thing that really upsets me isn’t your child-like name calling, it’s that by hiding in the manner that you are, I can’t discuss this with you in a more private manner. Instead, I’m left to post here my replies to you, which I think you’ll agree is far afield from the intended topic.
In the future, please refrain from attacking me here; Instead email me with your concerns so we can have a frank discussion about the subject without sullying Jodi’s message board with our disagreements.
Wes
09.May.03 at 6:52 am
I’d also like to contribute that everything Thomas says here is meant to support jodi, a cause I wholeheartedly support. Despite what I said before, I don’t actually think he’s being creepy about it. He’s been honest and upfront, which is more than I can say for most, even myself.
Thomas
09.May.03 at 8:14 am
Wes, I could kiss you… a long, slow, lingering kiss…
(Now THAT’S kinda creepy, even for me…)
Anonymous
09.May.03 at 8:25 am
How many people on this message board leave their emails? I’m expressing an opinion and doing so without the fear of retaliation by a computer hacker who would want to infest my email with a virus, that’s the truth. Maybe I’m the only one who thinks your comments while being supportive are also inappropriate if you are married to and committed to someone else, if so that’s it. You make it sound like if you lived closer to Jodi you could come physically make her all better. If I don’t use my email, then according to you I am a chicken shit coward, but to me I am being pragmatic. You too are not all knowing, you haven’t been sexually abused, you haven’t been raped like Jodi, maybe as a male you don’t realize that saying things with sexual undertones and innuendos are possibly offensive. That’s what messsages boards are for, for sharing and learning other points of view. Yes maybe I am a coward, I have been used and exploited by some men who are driven my hormones and lust, I have been betrayed in committed relationships the same way. I know this site is Jodi’s not mine, but she has asked us to dare, and I dared, I don’t think it’s your business to know my email and I don’t want to have you personally emailing me. I ask instead that you hear a voice, consider, if you don’t agree, fine, but maybe a seed or kernel of truth will sink in and you will consider if you’re getting your sexual or just intimate jollies from a distant vantage point that keeps you from being intimate or replaces intimacy with your wife. Wes has responded he doesn’t think what your doing is inappropriate. Jodi may agree wholeheartedly with you and Wes, so be it, an open forum is an open forum. I just hate to see married men use women in a vulnerable mindset as their rescue victims. Maybe Jodi enjoys the reassurance you offer, it’s unsettling to me and I expressed that, and I’m not sorry.
Thomas
09.May.03 at 8:57 am
I see now that you, you anonymous poster, are lashing out because my comments have struck a chord in your own personal life.
Still, you attacked me without my provocation to you. Perhaps you need to see a therapist about your anger management, self control and your own past abuse issues.
You accuse me of trying to “rescue” Jodi; perhaps I am, but Jodi and I both know if I indeed live closer, my physical comfort would consist of a shoulder to cry on. You have missed that point completely, I’d speculate from your own trauma resurfacing. You identify with Jodi and project a villianous persona at me most likely because someone in a similar position treated you badly. So in kind, you are equally rushing to Jodi’s side to support her, to protect her from “the bad man”. I’m sorry for your tragedies, but they don’t constitute grounds to attack someone you have never met.
As far as anyone “hacking” you if you provided your email address; I’ve been posting for more than a year. Apart from the occasional spam message about web hosting, I’ve had no such problems, and my messages are among the most heinous of crimes humanity has ever faced, right? It’s more likely that you remain anonymous out of a generalized fear and an inflated sense of foreboding, most likely due to your horrific experiences with men in the past.
How surprising would it be to you if you dilligently went back through every posting on every forum Jodi has ever presented her ideas in, and found that my wife’s messages to Jodi have at times been as, if not more, suggestive? Is she “creepy” too? Do you always judge people based on your limited experiences?
I will close in stating that while you claim to have “dared” to share your opinion, your fear, anonymity and hostile attitute prove that you have never really dared to do anything except to hurl blind, baseless accusations.
Anonymous
09.May.03 at 9:26 am
Let’s not exaggerate, I didn’t say your messages were the most heinous crimes of humanity. I said there was a creep factor and they were unsettling. Perhaps you defend yourself too much and have to use hyperbole to reinforce what logic may not support. I also said that your intentions were probably meant to be helpful. If something appears creepy or unsettling to me, it’s not blind or baseless, it’s how I feel. Why criticize me for name calling when you too call me a chickenshit coward. Is that only okay for you, not me? I too feel a sense of allegiance toward Jodi, and just don’t want to see her exploited by someone who can’t follow through with his patter.
Also, Jodi, thanks for the forum, it hones our writing and thought organizing skills.
Back to the topic at hand… I think you should put in one blue one and leave the other eye “naked” and see how long it takes the coworkers to notice. I did that with a pair of shoes once (one hiking boot, one chuck taylor) and it took people about two hours to say something about it.
Anonymous
09.May.03 at 10:29 am
I figured out why Thomas’s comments seem unsettling. He writes like he is Jodi’s lover, telling her how yummy and delicious she is. In a healthy relationship, what I deem to be healthy, the two people involved are on an equal level and treat each other with mutual respect. If Jodi were to reply to Thomas’s posts in the same “mushy” fashion, she may feel she is running the risk of stepping over boundaries that belong to his wife. If Thomas were to write me in the same manner he writes Jodi, my husband would probably feel that Thomas is overstepping his bounds. So Thomas, this is just a suggestion, which obviously you need not follow, encourage Jodi as a friend, not a lover. Soon she’ll find that guacamole licking guy who is not attached, who has not committed his heart to someone else, who can whisper sweet nothings in her ear, without fearing recriminations from someone else he belongs to. It’s as though her heart is a muscle that occasionally must be stretched by pain and ache so it is strong enough to uphold a real, lasting relationship with someone who likes her as much as she likes him, in a totally reciprocal relationship.
Magicvixen
09.May.03 at 1:11 pm
okay, listen up.
i, for one, believe that jodi is an able bodied adult that probably would be more than able to decide if her relationship with someone is causing her more pain than joy, and if she need not hear something from someone who is clearly a friend of hers. if it’s all out in the open, then what’s the problem? jodi is an adult perfectly capable of stopping hurtful “phrasing”. if she wants to be talked to in a tone less sexual, she’ll probably say something hersef, and not rely on an anonymous poster to speak for her. that said, there isn’t anything wrong with posting an honest opinion about another post in a forum. Wbut what is troublesome is the accusatory tone set from the start.
and to thomas, i only offer up this:
while i have noticed jodi is extraordinarily hard on herself, it really is up to only her to convince herself that she is beautiful, vibrant, amazing, a good person, etc. and while it is necessary to have supportive people to reaffirm this fact in her life, it truly is her own duty to believe this for herself. no amount of sexual undertone and reassurance or positivity from someone outside of a person can convince them of their worth. neither can the appearance of a loving man/partner/husband/boyfriend in their life convince a woman that she is worth loving, caring for, etc..before she learns that even alone she is all of these things.
we all have a past and our past affects who we are as people. but there comes a time in life where we have to take control and decide who we are and will be in the future. no one will or can decide for us, and people use the past as an excuse far too often for their laziness to do a little self-work and relize, fially, that the people in control of their life woking out is, in fact, only them. Blaming other people or blaming our past hurtful and terrorizing experiences for our present inadequacies is taking the easy way out and only ends in spining our proverbial wheels until we have dug ourselves so deep into the ground that we can never get out. My advice to jodi is to look inside of yourself and see who you truly are. Discover yourself, see your entire self, good and bad…and learn to love it all (and not just say you do, or love only most of it). If you cant love everything about you, how can you ever expect someone else to? Like I said before, though, people can say this to you until they are blue in the face, but it is up to ONLY you to do something about it.
that doesnt change, however, that you have a whole world full of people out here rooting for you. this forum debate alone should be evidence of that.
Anonymous
09.May.03 at 1:59 pm
Magicvixen, well said, I’d like to think that something like this, a public forum, is here for the public, in a way that if a young teenage girl or boy doing research about tanning beds comes here, maybe there’s a life lesson here or just guidance toward a life lesson that is being offered up. Jodi offers a focal point, but it seems many of the comments are offered up in support of not only her, but to her whole public web of readers; otherwise, we’d just email her in private (and privacy is one of those inalienable rights equal to freedom of speech–so far here in the US). We can all grow from each others’ wisdom, your post above is fine example of it. Right/Write On!!!!
Wes
10.May.03 at 5:46 am
>Wes, I could kiss you… a long, slow, lingering >kiss…
>(Now THAT’S kinda creepy, even for me…)
>– Thomas @ 8:14 AM : 09.May.03
I think, at least I hope, that your wife would mind a little more if you kissed me than jodi. I know I would mind more.
That said, I will now go wash my eyes. Back in a few.
Your eyes don’t look fraudulent. A little blue never hurt anyone.
Both are yummy… I’ll take a little from column A and from column B, please…
thomas, if you’ve already given your heart to another why are you writing all this mushy stuff to Jodi???? Give her a break, she deserves more than some guy cheating vicariously with her online, knowing full well he’s not going to go through with it, even though you may be trying to help. Also give the woman you’ve given your heart to a break by not sharing it with someone else over the internet!!!!!
I’ve been in support of Jodi for some time, and she knows I’m in a comitted relationship. Jodi and my wife both also know I think that Jodi is a vibrant, beautiful, articulate and interesting person. Jodi deserves so much, but sometimes she’s hard on herself; I’m there to let her know how desirable she really is. She knows I live too far away, am married, too Republican/Libertarian, etc. I still stand behind all my comments.
You live too far away for what, to cheat on your wife? there’s a creepy factor here.
Obviously you didn’t read the entire list of reasons; Distance is only one of the many.
I would give your views a little more weight, but someone who is too chicken-shit to leave their name and real email address should never be taken seriously.
If the creep factor is there, I don’t want to give you my name and email address. Maybe you should work on giving all that support to your spouse and let Jodi find someone who is full time available to get close to. It’s not that you shouldn’t be supportive, but you’re doing in it sexual come on way. only in my humble, chicken shit opinion. Profanity is the crutch of the verbally handicapped, but freedom of speech rocks.
Freedom of speech does indeed rock, but only a coward hides behind it using a veil of anonymity.
Would that you were omniscient, then you’d have all the facts. But you don’t. I don’t even need to tell you the facts as you’re not directly involved. So as it is, you’re judging me in an open forum without knowing the entire situation, which is none of your business in the first place. Publicly attacking me doesn’t reinforce your opinion or make it any more valid. It just makes it “hate speech”, which you’re still quite well within your rights to spew with as much venom as you can muster.
I think the thing that really upsets me isn’t your child-like name calling, it’s that by hiding in the manner that you are, I can’t discuss this with you in a more private manner. Instead, I’m left to post here my replies to you, which I think you’ll agree is far afield from the intended topic.
In the future, please refrain from attacking me here; Instead email me with your concerns so we can have a frank discussion about the subject without sullying Jodi’s message board with our disagreements.
I’d also like to contribute that everything Thomas says here is meant to support jodi, a cause I wholeheartedly support. Despite what I said before, I don’t actually think he’s being creepy about it. He’s been honest and upfront, which is more than I can say for most, even myself.
Wes, I could kiss you… a long, slow, lingering kiss…
(Now THAT’S kinda creepy, even for me…)
How many people on this message board leave their emails? I’m expressing an opinion and doing so without the fear of retaliation by a computer hacker who would want to infest my email with a virus, that’s the truth. Maybe I’m the only one who thinks your comments while being supportive are also inappropriate if you are married to and committed to someone else, if so that’s it. You make it sound like if you lived closer to Jodi you could come physically make her all better. If I don’t use my email, then according to you I am a chicken shit coward, but to me I am being pragmatic. You too are not all knowing, you haven’t been sexually abused, you haven’t been raped like Jodi, maybe as a male you don’t realize that saying things with sexual undertones and innuendos are possibly offensive. That’s what messsages boards are for, for sharing and learning other points of view. Yes maybe I am a coward, I have been used and exploited by some men who are driven my hormones and lust, I have been betrayed in committed relationships the same way. I know this site is Jodi’s not mine, but she has asked us to dare, and I dared, I don’t think it’s your business to know my email and I don’t want to have you personally emailing me. I ask instead that you hear a voice, consider, if you don’t agree, fine, but maybe a seed or kernel of truth will sink in and you will consider if you’re getting your sexual or just intimate jollies from a distant vantage point that keeps you from being intimate or replaces intimacy with your wife. Wes has responded he doesn’t think what your doing is inappropriate. Jodi may agree wholeheartedly with you and Wes, so be it, an open forum is an open forum. I just hate to see married men use women in a vulnerable mindset as their rescue victims. Maybe Jodi enjoys the reassurance you offer, it’s unsettling to me and I expressed that, and I’m not sorry.
I see now that you, you anonymous poster, are lashing out because my comments have struck a chord in your own personal life.
Still, you attacked me without my provocation to you. Perhaps you need to see a therapist about your anger management, self control and your own past abuse issues.
You accuse me of trying to “rescue” Jodi; perhaps I am, but Jodi and I both know if I indeed live closer, my physical comfort would consist of a shoulder to cry on. You have missed that point completely, I’d speculate from your own trauma resurfacing. You identify with Jodi and project a villianous persona at me most likely because someone in a similar position treated you badly. So in kind, you are equally rushing to Jodi’s side to support her, to protect her from “the bad man”. I’m sorry for your tragedies, but they don’t constitute grounds to attack someone you have never met.
As far as anyone “hacking” you if you provided your email address; I’ve been posting for more than a year. Apart from the occasional spam message about web hosting, I’ve had no such problems, and my messages are among the most heinous of crimes humanity has ever faced, right? It’s more likely that you remain anonymous out of a generalized fear and an inflated sense of foreboding, most likely due to your horrific experiences with men in the past.
How surprising would it be to you if you dilligently went back through every posting on every forum Jodi has ever presented her ideas in, and found that my wife’s messages to Jodi have at times been as, if not more, suggestive? Is she “creepy” too? Do you always judge people based on your limited experiences?
I will close in stating that while you claim to have “dared” to share your opinion, your fear, anonymity and hostile attitute prove that you have never really dared to do anything except to hurl blind, baseless accusations.
Let’s not exaggerate, I didn’t say your messages were the most heinous crimes of humanity. I said there was a creep factor and they were unsettling. Perhaps you defend yourself too much and have to use hyperbole to reinforce what logic may not support. I also said that your intentions were probably meant to be helpful. If something appears creepy or unsettling to me, it’s not blind or baseless, it’s how I feel. Why criticize me for name calling when you too call me a chickenshit coward. Is that only okay for you, not me? I too feel a sense of allegiance toward Jodi, and just don’t want to see her exploited by someone who can’t follow through with his patter.
Also, Jodi, thanks for the forum, it hones our writing and thought organizing skills.
Back to the topic at hand… I think you should put in one blue one and leave the other eye “naked” and see how long it takes the coworkers to notice. I did that with a pair of shoes once (one hiking boot, one chuck taylor) and it took people about two hours to say something about it.
I figured out why Thomas’s comments seem unsettling. He writes like he is Jodi’s lover, telling her how yummy and delicious she is. In a healthy relationship, what I deem to be healthy, the two people involved are on an equal level and treat each other with mutual respect. If Jodi were to reply to Thomas’s posts in the same “mushy” fashion, she may feel she is running the risk of stepping over boundaries that belong to his wife. If Thomas were to write me in the same manner he writes Jodi, my husband would probably feel that Thomas is overstepping his bounds. So Thomas, this is just a suggestion, which obviously you need not follow, encourage Jodi as a friend, not a lover. Soon she’ll find that guacamole licking guy who is not attached, who has not committed his heart to someone else, who can whisper sweet nothings in her ear, without fearing recriminations from someone else he belongs to. It’s as though her heart is a muscle that occasionally must be stretched by pain and ache so it is strong enough to uphold a real, lasting relationship with someone who likes her as much as she likes him, in a totally reciprocal relationship.
okay, listen up.
i, for one, believe that jodi is an able bodied adult that probably would be more than able to decide if her relationship with someone is causing her more pain than joy, and if she need not hear something from someone who is clearly a friend of hers. if it’s all out in the open, then what’s the problem? jodi is an adult perfectly capable of stopping hurtful “phrasing”. if she wants to be talked to in a tone less sexual, she’ll probably say something hersef, and not rely on an anonymous poster to speak for her. that said, there isn’t anything wrong with posting an honest opinion about another post in a forum. Wbut what is troublesome is the accusatory tone set from the start.
and to thomas, i only offer up this:
while i have noticed jodi is extraordinarily hard on herself, it really is up to only her to convince herself that she is beautiful, vibrant, amazing, a good person, etc. and while it is necessary to have supportive people to reaffirm this fact in her life, it truly is her own duty to believe this for herself. no amount of sexual undertone and reassurance or positivity from someone outside of a person can convince them of their worth. neither can the appearance of a loving man/partner/husband/boyfriend in their life convince a woman that she is worth loving, caring for, etc..before she learns that even alone she is all of these things.
we all have a past and our past affects who we are as people. but there comes a time in life where we have to take control and decide who we are and will be in the future. no one will or can decide for us, and people use the past as an excuse far too often for their laziness to do a little self-work and relize, fially, that the people in control of their life woking out is, in fact, only them. Blaming other people or blaming our past hurtful and terrorizing experiences for our present inadequacies is taking the easy way out and only ends in spining our proverbial wheels until we have dug ourselves so deep into the ground that we can never get out. My advice to jodi is to look inside of yourself and see who you truly are. Discover yourself, see your entire self, good and bad…and learn to love it all (and not just say you do, or love only most of it). If you cant love everything about you, how can you ever expect someone else to? Like I said before, though, people can say this to you until they are blue in the face, but it is up to ONLY you to do something about it.
that doesnt change, however, that you have a whole world full of people out here rooting for you. this forum debate alone should be evidence of that.
Magicvixen, well said, I’d like to think that something like this, a public forum, is here for the public, in a way that if a young teenage girl or boy doing research about tanning beds comes here, maybe there’s a life lesson here or just guidance toward a life lesson that is being offered up. Jodi offers a focal point, but it seems many of the comments are offered up in support of not only her, but to her whole public web of readers; otherwise, we’d just email her in private (and privacy is one of those inalienable rights equal to freedom of speech–so far here in the US). We can all grow from each others’ wisdom, your post above is fine example of it. Right/Write On!!!!
>Wes, I could kiss you… a long, slow, lingering >kiss…
>(Now THAT’S kinda creepy, even for me…)
>– Thomas @ 8:14 AM : 09.May.03
I think, at least I hope, that your wife would mind a little more if you kissed me than jodi. I know I would mind more.
That said, I will now go wash my eyes. Back in a few.