save me, save me, be the light in my eyes

i feel a little like i’ve been hit by a truck, but really i’ve only been hit by a clue. i’ve spent most of my five days off in a depressive funk, sleeping as much as possible– trying to avoid thinking about work and my personal life, and succeeding quite well. sleep, tends to do that. when you’re asleep you can’t really think.

i’ve come to the conclusion that no matter how many tears i shed, how many pouts i pout, i am not going to be able to convince anyone to feel anything special for me. either it’s gonna happen or it’s not and crying isn’t going to coax those emotions from someone. such is life.

i’ve also finally realized that prince charming isn’t going to save me from myself (yes, i’m a gemini so i get to play both the captive princess and the wicked witch). i am the only one who can save me. and even if your side of the bed is filled with someone, when the lights go out i’m all i got and all i’ll ever have. i’m it. so i better get used to it.

and i’ve decided that i’m not going to let the bossman get me down.

also, i’ve learned that i’m not so good at cooking a roast.

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7 Comments

  1. peter 02.Dec.02 at 3:43 am

    i spent my vacation sleeping with the tv remote and various books may what you have bring you joy thanks.

    Reply
  2. Kevin 02.Dec.02 at 7:59 am

    Sorry about the roast, but I think the self-realizations were totally worth a less-than-stellar hunk of meat! (and what are men really, but less-than-stellar hunks of meat?)

    Reply
  3. Thomas 02.Dec.02 at 9:05 am

    I disagree. Your someone is out there. I’ve told you that before. You’ve disagreed with me too.

    In other news, I like soup.

    Reply
  4. Christopher 02.Dec.02 at 9:17 am

    Hey!

    I resent that!

    I’m not a “less-than-stellar hunk of meat!”

    I’m a “pretty-close-to-stellar hunk of meat!” 😉

    (Well, as close as any hunk of meat is likely to get in this world…)

    That said, jodi, know that I (and, I think, the rest of your devotees) recognize & applaud your talent, even if the bossman hasn’t.

    Know also that, if it weren’t for those pesky laws of physics that prevent space and time from bending & curving to our whims, there are many of us who would be there for you in a heartbeat to offer a consoling hug when you need one.

    Instead, the best we can offer is the “virtual hug.” And the odd (sometimes very!) word of encouragement:

    Wearing the Superman “S” shield carries with it the responsibility to do good & be super.

    I have no doubt you can handle the reponsiblity!

    Reply
  5. Bonny 02.Dec.02 at 12:04 pm

    It’s a good thing you realize you cannot “convince” someone to feel ANYTHING. It just doesn’t work that way.

    Reply
  6. jodi 02.Dec.02 at 12:08 pm

    yeah, but do you have any idea how much easier my life would be if i could convince people to feel stuff?

    Reply
  7. Thomas 03.Dec.02 at 7:02 am

    Well, I suppose you convince a couple of us here in Michigan to feel YOU up… (insert wicked grins here)

    Reply

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