i feel a little like i’ve been hit by a truck, but really i’ve only been hit by a clue. i’ve spent most of my five days off in a depressive funk, sleeping as much as possible– trying to avoid thinking about work and my personal life, and succeeding quite well. sleep, tends to do that. when you’re asleep you can’t really think.
i’ve come to the conclusion that no matter how many tears i shed, how many pouts i pout, i am not going to be able to convince anyone to feel anything special for me. either it’s gonna happen or it’s not and crying isn’t going to coax those emotions from someone. such is life.
i’ve also finally realized that prince charming isn’t going to save me from myself (yes, i’m a gemini so i get to play both the captive princess and the wicked witch). i am the only one who can save me. and even if your side of the bed is filled with someone, when the lights go out i’m all i got and all i’ll ever have. i’m it. so i better get used to it.
and i’ve decided that i’m not going to let the bossman get me down.
also, i’ve learned that i’m not so good at cooking a roast.