I was lost today. Lost for a long, long time. Lost in the pages of a book that struck too close to my heart, lost in the past that I can?t decide if I?m happy that I let go or I?m sad that I did, lost in my own strange waking dreamworld.

A majority of the day was spent floating in and out of various consciousnesses. I spent some time curled up in the middle of my bed crying with a wretched case of the mean reds.

I spent a lot of time crying about Samuel. He?s a character in a short story by Adam Haslett. Samuel is 11 and he has dreams that come true in the most wretched ways. I cried for Samuel and wanted to tell him that it?s ok. Because I have dreams that come true too, and it?s easier as you get older. You lose that sense of responsibility.

I was lost, but then the phone rang and I was so quickly found it was magical. Magical!

About the only person on earth who would have noticed I was lost did, and he called to find to me.

And now here I am fishing the chocolate hearts out of the Godiva ice cream and writing again.