Fuckers.

So after much rigarmarole, I’m getting Cable TV and because we live in Communist Russia or because there is only one Cable Guy to service the Twin Cities Metro area, I’ve had to wait an entire week for my much-wanted Cable TV. Clearly Time Warner does not realize that this is America and it is my god-given right to get whatever I want whenever I want it.

Hrmph.

So while I wait impatiently for the Cable Guy (and I’m hoping I get the H-O-T Cable Guy that Sister #2 got a few weeks back when she needed her modem fixed), I’m doing Nick’s Meme. But before that, you should watch this Kidd Video video. It comes into play later.

(also, I’m pretty sure that the nerdy, chubby, bespectacled band member is Cousin Oliver from the Brady Bunch, or maybe Cousin Oliver’s son)

Three people who make me laugh:
1. FFJ
2. Al, the cutest girl on earth™
3. My westernerd pal Zook

Three things I can do:
1. Gleek
2. Drink my fair share
3. Have multiple orgasms

Three things I can’?t do:
1. Stand on a chair to change a lightbulb
2. Speak Italian
3. Hardly wait

Three things I’?m doing right now:
1. Waiting for the Cable Guy
2. Listening to Guided by Wire by Neko Case & Her Boyfriends
3. Pondering a nap

Three things I want to do before I die:
1. Have sex
2. Go to Venice
3. Publish a short story

Three things I hate the most:
1. Intolerance
2. Gwen Stefani
3. Being stuck somewhere and bored

Three things that scare me:
1. Worms
2. Never being loved
3. The awkward conversation that will ensue once the cable guy gets here

Three things I don’t understand:
1. Physics
2. Pluto’s demotion
3. Avid pro-sports fans

Three skills I’d like to learn:
1. How to play guitar
2. Self-discipline
3. Juggling

Three ways to describe my personality:
1. Loud
2. Opinionated
3. Annoying

Three things I think you should listen to:
1. The Replacements
2. The Kooks
3. The Mike Doughty

Things you should never listen to:
1. Your inner-critic
2. The News
3. Gwen Stefani

Three favorite foods:
1. Potatoes, I’ve never met one I didn’t like
2. Starburst
3. Green Peppers

Three beverages I drink regularly:
1. Water
2. Green Tea
3. Diet Coke with Lime

Three shows I watched as a kid:
1. Kidd Video
2. Dance Party USA
3. Rat Patrol

Blogs I’ve passed this on to (as mentioned above):
1. Kelly
2. FFJ
3. Wolfdogg

The post While I wait for the cable guy appeared first on I Will Dare.

I’m having entirey too much fun with the concert ticket generator [via}

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The post This is where you realize this is all just a giant ploy to keep myself amused appeared first on I Will Dare.

so i did it too.

incidentally, i must note that the list doesn’t include “The World According to Garp,” “Secretary,” “High Fidelity” or “In the Bedroom.” which i would say are some pretty amazing adaptations.

1. 1984 [read]
2. Alice in Wonderland [watched]
3. American Psycho [read & watched – they both suck]
4. Breakfast at Tiffany’s [read & watched]
. Brighton Rock
6. Catch 22 [watched]
7. Charlie & the Chocolate Factory [watched]
8. A Clockwork Orange [watched]
9. Close Range (inc Brokeback Mountain) [i haven’t read the whole collection, but i have watched & read the story Brokeback Mountain]
10. The Day of the Triffids
11. Devil in a Blue Dress
12. Different Seasons (inc The Shawshank Redemption)
13. Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? (aka Bladerunner)
14. Doctor Zhivago [read & watched, thank you Mr. Dahl]
15. Empire of the Sun
16. The English Patient
17. Fight Club [watched]
18. The French Lieutenant’s Woman
19. Get Shorty
20. The Godfather [read half the book when i was in high school and never finished]
21. Goldfinger
22. Goodfellas [watched]
23. Heart of Darkness (aka Apocalypse Now)
24. The Hound of the Baskervilles
25. Jaws
26. The Jungle Book [watched]
27. A Kestrel for a Knave (aka Kes)
28. LA Confidential
29. Les Liaisons Dangereuses [watched]
30. Lolita [read & watched]
31. Lord of the Flies [read & watched]
32. The Maltese Falcon
33. Oliver Twist
34. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest [read & watched]
35. Orlando
36. The Outsiders [read & watched]
37. Pride and Prejudice
38. The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie
39. The Railway Children
40. Rebecca
41. The Remains of the Day
42. Schindler’s Ark (aka Schindler’s List) [watched]
43. Sin City [watched]
44. The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
45. The Talented Mr Ripley
46. Tess of the D’Urbervilles
47. Through a Glass Darkly
48. To Kill a Mockingbird [read & watched]
49. Trainspotting [watched]
50. The Vanishing [watched]
51. Watership Down

The post there’s nothing like a meme to keep you from cleaning the house appeared first on I Will Dare.

that being said some people hate memes. so no bitching motherfuckers, you’ve been warned.

7 things to do before I die:
1. go to venice
2. have a child or two
3. shake mike doughty’s hand
4. publish a short story
E. find my biological father
6. enter all my books into Delicious Library
7. have sex outside with a partner

7 things I cannot do:
1. a cartwheel
2. go a day without checking e-mail
3. bake
4. make the first move
^. flirt with men
6. not tell you what i think
7. apply makeup

7 things that attract me to my (potential) mate:
1. His eyes
2. his hips
3. his hands
4. his good taste in books, music and or movies
*. his passion for something, anything
6. he’s on the tall side of not shrimpy
7. oh and his brains

7 things I say:
1. rad
2. awesome, awesome
3. nice
4. are you trying to kill me?
_. Fuck
6. wha?
7. clearly you hate me

7 books I love:
1. A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving
2. Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
3. An Invisible Sign of My Own by Aimee Bender
4. Written on the Body by Jeanette Winterson
>. Girlfriend in a Coma by Douglas Coupland
6. The Cheese Monkeys by Chip Kidd
7. Veronica by Mary Gaitskill

7 movies I love:
1. almost famous
2. high fidelity
3. mallrats
4. shakespeare in love

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