Dear Nestl?, I?m writing you to express my concern. Recently, I purchased a bag of your candied confections known as Chewy Sprees. I was most excited to partake of this culinary treat. I loved Sprees…

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i’d like to nominate as the best invention of the 20th century: Louis Rich Turkey Cheese Dogs.

sometimes when I am grinding away ferociously on an atomic fireball i think that maybe i am just chewing up chunks of tooth that have broken off and not the actual jawbreaker.

i dream of living in a world where i never, ever have to wear socks. i hate socks. they just piss me off and make my feet feel weird. blech. boo socks!

stuffing manicotti shells is about 843,915 times less fun than eating them. also, my hands smell like a pizza place.

i think i have exceeded the maximum capacity of chewy chips ahoy for an adult female by at least two cookies. i capped that off by a sinful piece of chocolate covered chocolate. don’t mind…

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