Hello Darling Ones,

It’s been a long time since I took to the web to complain about a book, but I read one yesterday that infuriated me more than any book has in a long time.

For the most part I quit a book the moment it starts to annoy me. Doesn’t matter how far I get into it. I’ve DNFed (did not finish) at 75% though. Life is too short and all that.

Another thing I tend to avoid are books that are wildly popular. I’m of the rather snooty belief that for a book to be so universally adored it’s gotta be kind of bland. It probably takes no chances either in the writing or the storytelling. Often it seems the characters are flat or generic so readers can fill in the gaps the writer left with themselves.

However, Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke has garnered a bunch of buzz and I’m fascinated by influencer culture so when my hold came through from the library I was pumped. To say I was disappointed is an understatement.

The novel is being marketed as a satire about tradwives and influencers. If it is, the satire was lost on me. I couldn’t tell what point Burke was trying to make. Tradwives are angry about everything? For reasons?

The gist of the story: Natalie is a tradwife influencer with five kids, a hapless hubby from a rich family who suddenly wakes up in the 1800s living the life she cosplayed for her millions of followers.

Want to know why this book was such an utter disaster for me? Because the author failed at the Number One tenet of writing: your character has to want something and your reader should probably know what that is, even if your character doesn’t.

All through the book I kept muttering, “what does she want?” I can’t tell you. She seemed to hate everything: her kids, her husband, her in-laws, all the people who worked for her, women who adored her, women who hated her, and even, sometimes, God.

Natalie wanted nothing. And not just in the material way of someone who repeatedly says “money is no object.” She is one of those characters with so little vitally and humanity that nothing would have made her happy. She was Burke’s distaste about religious tradwife influencers in the shape of a human.

Again, what was the satire? Is it that Natalie was supposed to be a pious, traditional, man is the ruler of the home kind of woman, but she was calling the shots and running a successful business? Isn’t that the real, actual hypocrisy of tradwife influencers? They run successful businesses while pretending to be women who give up their agency to their husbands so they can focus on parenting and housekeeping. We all know this.

The book made no sense and said nothing about women, “traditional” values, religion, or 1800s. It was so vapid. And the 1800s twist was quite disappointing and doesn’t hold up to any kind of deep thought. I won’t spoil it for you, but it’s a cop out.

Yesteryear is a muddy slush pit of all kinds of buzz topics: religion, misogyny, erectile dysfunction, social media, conservative politics, influencer culture, the manosphere, perhaps latent homosexuality, and anything else you can think of.

It also reinforces my snooty belief about books that are wildly popular taking zero riisks and end up not saying anything. Boo to this book.

Love,
Jodi

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Hi Darling Ones,

How goes it? I’m eating Dots for the first time in nearly three years and they are delicious. I’ve missed Dots. I also miss Starburst. I do not miss jellybeans because I keep an empty Talenti-pint of them in my nightstand drawer for low blood sugar purposes. And, let me tell you, nothing cures your craving for FaveReds jellybeans (RIP greenbag starburst jellybeans) like chewing them at 3 a.m., grinding sugar into your recently brushed teeth while your glucose monitor will not shut the fuck up about your impending death by low blood sugar.

ANYWAY, I miss Dots, but not more than I enjoy having a 5.4 A1C.

Orange you glad you asked? Nobody asked, but I am feeling icky about having fallen off the writing wagon. Today’s probably not the best day to write because my head is especially “strokey,” which makes focussing extra difficult. Like most of my strokiness I do things just to spite it as if this collection of annoyances has a personality.

Along with eating Dots I’m also listening to the new Amanda Shires’ album. It came out yesterday and so I’m still pondering it. The jury is still out in the Court of Spinster Opinion. One of these days I’m gonna get around to writing about The Beths’ new record because I love it so much I had to text my friend Hotrod heart eyes emojis about it.

I’ve also been listening to Stoned: Jewelry, Obsession, and How Desire Shapes the World by Aja Raden and it is fabulous. It’s my favorite kind of nonfiction — well-written, funny, and filled with news-to-me stuff. For instance did you know that emeralds are green because of Chromium? Me neither and now I love them even more.

Most of my time, though, is spent pondering what I’m going to do with the rest of my life if/when I get on the dole. What will I do if I don’t use my brain capacity worrying about money and my time trying to earn money? I’m not sure. In the before I’d just write and write and write some more. It’s what I’ve always longed for the time and freedom to write. Now that I might get that, writing is physically taxing. My Floppy Scoop and eyes are not fans of the typing and reading. I’ve certainly been cursed with be careful what you wish for. Or so it seems.

Floudneringly yours,
Jodi

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Hola Darling Ones,

I’m becoming the kind of person who says “hola” in greeting. I say it about 93 times a day. Each time a cat comes down the stairs I say, “Hola, Gatito/Gatita. I love you. You’re a cat!”

They often need reminders both that I love them and that they’re cats. I don’t want them to forget, especially because Fergus’ theme song is about her being the worst.

In my head it’s a Gidgetesque song. A Jodi & Fergus duet that goes like this:
Whose the worst cat in the whole wide world?
It’s Fergus!
That’s me! (and she says this with one of her furry paws in the air, toe beans on display)

Who’s a total delight while she’s ruining your life?
It’s Fergus!
That’s me!

She’s a menace to her father.
A menace to her brother.
A menace to every one who loves her.
It’s Fergus!
That’s me!

See? We have fun!

Anyway, I came here to write a few words of appreciation. I didn’t appreciate anything in March and I feel a little shitty about that. Not because anyone cares, but because I let myself down by not doing it. I’ve lost or am redefining so much of who I am that it feels icky when I don’t write.

The Antidote by Karen Russell

My favorite novel so far this year. Five stars! Inventive and smart, though I have a few reservations about it.

It’s about a Prairie Witch in dust bowl era Nebraska who is a vault for people’s memories. They deposit them into her and get a deposit slip they can use to retrieve the memory at a later date.

There’s also a basketball loving teen girl, her bachelor uncle, a photographer, a cat, a scarecrow, a photographer, and a sheriff. There’s a bunch of history and magical realism and all of it is wonderful. A story about weather and the land and what we did to it and what role our memories play in making us whole. I loved it all. If you read it we must talk!

Earth to Moon by Moon Unit Zappa

I did not expect much from this memoir by Frank Zappa’s eldest child. I knew of her vaguely because of MTV and the song Valley Girl. But I like music and music-adjacent books. This one was a damn delight. Zappa is funny and smart, and tells the story of her family with honesty. It’s not a happy story and while she has much more empathy for her mother, I do not. Gail Zappa was a vindictive monster. Check it out if you’re into music, sacrifices people make to “male genius,” or twisted moms.

The Latest Jams

A few words about some records I’ve been digging recently.

• “Send a Prayer My Way,” Julien Baker & Torres. In the BS (before stroke) era, this would have been an automatic pre-order, but I can’t buy records anymore due to being poor. However, thanks to streaming I get to listen to this lovely lesbian country album. I super appreciate it because it’s matching up nicely with a book I read recently (The Exvangelicals by Sarah McCammon) and making me think about religious trauma.
• “Big Ugly,” Fust. You know I don’t often give new male artists a lot of my attention, so you know this has gotta be good. It gives me a bit of that 70s country rock vibe. Plus, they have a song called “Jody” and I forgive them the misspelling.
• “Billboard Heart,” Deep Sea Diver. Do you like rock & roll music? You’ll like this.
• “I Don’t Know But How They Found Me!” Jensen McRae. Listen if you like well-written, deeply emotional songs by young women. I love this one because the feelings are universal, but the perspective is new to me (she’s like 30 years young than I am).

What have you been reading or listening to, Darling Ones?

Love,
Jodi (not Jody)

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Hola Darling Ones,

Every month I vow to work on this post throughout the month so my eyes & Floppy Scoop don’t eet pooped out from all the typing and reading. Every month I do not do that. But hope springs eternal, so maybe next month?

Matthew Sweet Recovers from Stroke at Madonna

I’ve watched this video of Sweet’s stroke recovery process about 12 times since my friend Robin shared it with me. Each time I get a little shaky and anxious and then tears shoot from eyes. It’s cathartic.

I see a lot of my experience in his. The slight shake of his head as he speaks is the same shake my head does. The tremor is his left hand is similar to the one in my right. The inability to walk more than a few feet, same! When I was doing weekly OT/PT I didn’t get to use a cool robotic arm, and there was zero drawing with markers. Instead, my OT had me typing and writing, because that’s what writers do.

This is a good watch if you’re curious about what stroke recovery is like.

The Floor

Sister #2 dropped her appreciation for the Rob Lowe-hosted gameshow into the family chat telling us it was a nice balance for all the murder shows she usually watches.

While I usually ignore most TV suggestions for everyone (i’m bad at watching TV), Sister #4 and I gave it shot when she was here for dinner one night.

Darling Ones, I love it because it’s a trivia gameshow you have to watch and pay attention to. This means you can’t doomscroll or practice Spanish or crochet while it’s on. I mean you could, but you’d miss the point. Contestants, who get to pick their area of expertise, have to identify things by picture or missing word. Since I’m an arrogant prick, I have to watch to prove I know more than they do.

It is a delight to just focus on one single thing without my brain weasels involved. It is the most relaxing 20-45 minutes (depending on my attention span) of my day.

I also like it because it makes me ponder what my expert category would be. My first choice was “Bob’s Burgers” but after watching men continuously fail because they don’t recognize women rappers, athletes, CEOs, actors, etc., I’d probably go with Female Indie Singers and then rule that floor.

The Harder I Fight the More I Love You by Neko Case

Holy buckets did I love this memoir. So much so that’s I’m gonna have to revisit my Top 10 Nonfiction Music Books from 2021.

Before cracking the book I knew Case was an excellent songwriter, I’ve been a fan of eons. However, great songs don’t always translate into great memoirs (sorry Bob Mould, Pete Townshend, Kathleen Hanna, etc.), Case’s memoir is great. It’s emotionally honest, interesting, and unsparing. It focuses a lot on her early years growing up in poverty and it’s rough to read at times, but you can see the genisus of some her songs in the stories she shares, and that is the best.

Greek Yogurt Bagels

As previously mentioned I care about carbs & protein now. One of the ways I’ve cramming more protein into my gob is by making Greek Yogurt Bagels for my daily breakfast sandwich. They are pretty good. I’ve made them twice and the second time they were even better (perhaps I kneaded them more?). If you care about carbs and bagels, give them a short. I’m hesitant to share any recipe from a site barfily called “skinnytaste,” but it’s the recipe I follow.

What have you been digging, Darling Ones? I’m ever-so curious.

Appreciatively yours,
Jodi

The post Appreciation 2.25 appeared first on I Will Dare.

Hi Darling Ones,

Here’s a look at some of the stuff I’ve been digging this month. I spared you the Barley Chronicles but will sum it up as OMG BARLEY! Who knew?

People Who Listen to My Election Anxiety

You can always tell when somethings got my anxiety on high – I don’t shut up about it. As the election draws nearer I’m rambling to everyone about how anxious it’s making me. I’m afraid if Harris wins and I’m afraid if she loses. I do not trust Republicans to handle this election and any outcome like rational adults.

I’m reminded after I had my colonoscopy when I told the guy they had six years (or whenever I need another one) to get the prep stuff to taste like a milkshake.

“Everyone says the prep is the worst,” he said.
“Eh,” I said. “Everyone must have a bad imagination. It wasn’t fun but it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be.”

That’s how my brain is doing the election. I’m imaging large-scale armed insurrection where Republicans take Coon Rapids and the Dakota and I need to hunker down in Supergenuis HQ trying to participate in some kind of underground railroad for Trump’s “enemies” and that’s the scenario if Harris wins!

OBSERVATIONS FROM A CROWDED ROOM, Joy Oladokun

As a white midewestern lady it feels weird to write about how much I enjoy Oladokun’s new record about dealing with racism and her role in music.

But it’s smart, beautiful record and the least I can do is bear witness. I’ve been a fan since I first stumbled on “sorry isn’t good enough.”

This new record is chef’s kiss and one of those I’ve listened to in its entirety every day. I love when she talks about James Baldwin and waiting for progress. “I’d Miss the Birds” is my favorite song on the record. So sad and beautiful, my favorite combo next to sweet and salty.

We Are Living in a Golden Age of Apples

I love apples and am #TeamHoneycrisp, though I’ll SweeTango and Cosmic Crisp will do in a pinch. I also love whatever green apple AffyTapple uses. Red Delicious are garbage and I’d rather have zero apples than one of those things.

This article about apples is fascinating and not at all boring even thought it contains words like “genome” and “Mesopotamia.”

Really liked this bit:
“I spoke with several apple researchers while working on this story, and do you know who loves their jobs? Apple researchers. And that’s not just because they get to taste new varieties all the time and spend workdays in an orchard. All of them, as well as the other orchardists and hobbyists I know, are proud of the progress they’ve made in the past few decades and optimistic about the future.”

On Legacies, Noticing, and Being Seen

This 20-minute talk pulled at my heart strings and made my neurons fire. And it gave me goosebumps. Just watch it. I don’t want to say more and spoil the delight.

A Few Books

I’m gonna keep this part short because the Floppy Scoop is protesting and my eyes are starting to not focus.

Icarus by K. Ancrum — a lovely YA novel about art theft and finding your community.

The Plot and The Sequel by Jean Hanff Korelitz — literary mysteries in the truest sense of the word. Plagiarism and death and black mail and so so so funny,

Blue Sisters by Coco Mellors — while nothing earth-shatteringly original or even surprising, it’s a lovely book about grief and sisterhood. Really hit me where it counts because it’s about four sisters and that’s my weakness.

What have you dug this lovely October?

Jodi

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