the sister club and i attended a wedding in bloomer, wisconsin this weekend.
i wish you could have been there, because it was the epitome of small town wisconsin. from the unairconditioned pines ballroom, to the men of the bridal party wearing baseball caps, this entire event just smacked of hickville.
i present to you the menu:
potato dumplings
sauerkraut
roastbeef
meatballs
coleslaw
white bread with butter
mashed potatoes
cheese (c’mon it was wisconsin).
milk
yes, that was it. it was like a cattle feed, just giant vats of food with a line stretching from the buffet table to the parking lot. apparently there are no vegetarians in bloomer, wisconsin.
of all the guests my favorite, and i had planned to ask him to dance but it was too damn hot, was the farmer. he was wearing brand new (you could see the creases) oshkosh b’gosh overalls, a greenish shirt and an old, stained john deere baseball cap. at one point he was walking around with not one, but two bottles of bud light in his back pocket. i just wanted to smooch him.
i had a great time counting the mullets, while sisters #2 and #3 got totally wasted and sister #4 sat in the corner pouting because nathan’s girlfriend was there. at one point sisters #2 and #3 were re-enacting a dixie chicks’ video in the middle of a giant circle of people on the dance floor. they were nothing, if not entertaining.
at one point, the floor of the ballroom started to shake. it scared the bejesus out of me as i was lost in thought staring at a mullet that i couldn’t quite decide the gender of. i still don’t know.
but the floor started to shake because everyone was stomping their foot and clapping their hands. the dance floor was filled and the singing voices drowned out the voice on the CD.
“oh play me some mountain music like gramma and grampa used to play to a cajun hideaway, hey, heeeeyyyyy!”
yes, i was totally out of my element. but it was damn fun seeing how other people live and celebrate.
yeeehaww!
i’m sure you looked real purty in your dress
Is this the same Pines I used to shoe-bop at in the late 60’s???
Come on, I live in Bloomer and there are not that many mullets and you say. One knob here or there, but that is it. Maybe if you get you big city nose out of the air. You might see that living in hickville has many more pluses than that shitty ass, non stop, rude, could go on and on city that I assume you live in. I know, I have been there done that.
Wow
What a stupid Bitch!
Wow! Bloomer is about one of the nicest places in the world. In college, the girl in the next room in our dorm was from Bloomer. She was the nicest, sweetest person you’d want to me. Her dad was a mail man and she had been a cheerleader in high school – her stories of Bloomer were the greatest!
I’ll never forget her waiting for the Bloomer Advance and the tales of the “Jump Rope Capital of the World.”
Wow! Bloomer is about one of the nicest places in the world. In college, the girl in the next room in our dorm was from Bloomer. She was the nicest, sweetest person you’d want to meet. Her dad was a mail man and she had been a cheerleader in high school – her stories of Bloomer were the greatest!
I’ll never forget her waiting for the Bloomer Advance and the tales of the “Jump Rope Capital of the World.”
I have lived in Bloomer for my whole live, I’ve traveled to many places but yet seem to always come back to my hometown. I have been to many of those weddings you have just mentioned, they are all the same. But I do have to ask, Didn’t you have a blast? The fun part is making fun of the people stuck in the 70’s with their mullets, the drunks ones waving their fists with the music, and the barrels and cases of Bud Light that are consumed. It’s our heritage I guess you could say. I love going to a big city club and being in that atmosphere but I still enjoy a good ole fashion Bloomer gathering.
Yup, sounds like a typical wedding there. Although my sister, who lives north of Bloomer can beat it. She got married at a game farm. So imagine, the same wedding with hunting parties going out.
But after living on the East Coast for three years. I sort of miss it.