Sitting at my parents washing clothes, I decided to do a bit of channel surfing. Since I am still not watching tv whilst at home, this is an extra-special treat for me.

While clicking through the channels, I happen upon a skateboarding competition on NBC. It was so surreal. It was some sort of Vans Triple Crown thing. It reminded me of a gymnastics or figure skating competition, only it was skateboarding.

The commentators were saying things like:
?Oh, look at that a kick-flip ollie ending in a back lip flip.?
?You can really see his background of street skating come out here.?
?In his spare time Chad designs public skate parks in California, really he does it all over the world.?
?Chad is always giving back to the community.?

What the fuck? For a moment I thought maybe I was trapped in some kind of parallel universe. I mean, this is the sport that launched a thousand t-shirts and bumper stickers with the slogan, ?Skateboarding is not a crime.? I remember taking pictures for my black and white photography class of rose and burger boy. They were a little sketchy at the school, waiting for the cops to come by and give them grief. My brother in law used to get lectured by the cops all the time.

And now it?s on tv with professional color commentators?

Weird.

It was getting a bit too strange for me so I flipped to a sure favorite?a cooking show on PBS.

There I watched a very old Julia Childs cooking with some poor schmuck named Jacque. I felt bad for ol? Jacque. Julia was being on old bag. He?s trying to whip up some souffl?s and a giant ho-ho looking thing and she?s just ripping on him the entire time.

Making fun of his choice of cheese, the way he separates his egg whites, not using all the cream in the bowl. I woulda decked her smarmy French-cooking ass. It was terrible.

Sometimes I miss cable tv like nobody?s business.