tonight was perhaps the longest night in bowling history. i didn’t think they were ever gonna finish. i was so bored i even called stink to wish him a happy birthday and find out if i should bring fajitas to the party tomorrow. i was so bored that when curly haired randy asked for a hug, i gave him one. so bored that i told marv, some random hanger-outer, that i was, in fact, a st. martin and then went on to regale him with tales of what all my aunts and uncles are up to. so bored that i read most of the city pages, the two student stories for class next week, and a story outta the new mcsweeneys, shared a pizza with craig, shared a pack of starburst with some drunk girlfriend of a bowler, and searched in vane for something to impale myself on to make the boredom stop.